Coming Home
by cinnybuns
Summary: Kagome returns to the Feudal Era at 23, after vowing never to return after the last time it opened. In search of her friends and the meaning to her existence, she stumbles across her old wolf demon. A story about finding each other.
1. Prologue: Ayame

Coming Home

Prologue

Author Note: At 15 years old, Kagome thought she knew what she wanted. The well closed up after her last trip and for 3 years, she was left to reflect on her relationship with InuYasha and everything that went wrong. She returns to the Feudal Era after graduation but a lot has happened since she was gone those three short years. She returns home broken hearted vowing to never return to the Feudal Era. You know what they say: Never say never. (Character Death)

" _I don't care, I love you anyhow. It is too late to turn you out of my heart. Part of you lives here." –Anne Sexton_

Ayame sat patiently as Kouga bathed in the lake surrounding them, washing the blood from the demon they had just killed from his hair. Ayame waited at the edge dipping a toe in the freezing water.

"She's not coming back," she said matter of factly.

She had repeated it over and over like a mantra.

It didn't matter.

Ayame tilted her head to the side watching him, the sun overhead causing her to strain her eyes. Just a little. She turned her attention to her leg swinging back and forth in the water.

"I know you don't want to talk about it, but you have to know she isn't going to come back."

Kouga gave her a low warning growl, before he ground out, "Leave it, Ayame."

Ayame chuckled cruelly before continuing. "It's pathetic really. Pining after a tiny, weak human who won't ever come back when you could have anyone you wanted."

Kouga rubbed his nails over his scalp, still rinsing in the lake. "You mean, I could have you, is that right?" His tone suggested he would rather anything but that.

She frowned. "Don't make it sound so awful. But yes."

Kouga rang the water from his long hair and had the sudden urge to run. Just to get away.

"Ayame." If she knew better – she didn't, or pretended not to – she would shut her trap and leave him to his bathing.

"Yes, Kouga?" Ayame answered, her voice sickly sweet.

"We have been over this. I will not mate with you," he said, his teeth baring in anger. "I would sooner mate with a fish."

Ayame stood, her fists clenched at her sides, shouting. "Why do you love her?!" she stomped, demanding to know. "You know what's really pathetic? She doesn't even love you. When she was here, she chose that dog demon and you still chased her! Why, Kouga?!" Again, "Why do you love her?! She's not coming back! _Ever!_ "

Kouga felt his anger getting out of control, still waist deep in the murky water. It was too much. Ayame carrying on as she was. This wasn't the first time. He needed to get out of there.

"You know what's pathetic, Ayame?" Kouga said, his voice dangerously low. He kept his eyes closed, his fists clenched at his sides. "We aren't so different, you and I. I have told you that I don't want you and you still follow me like a sad puppy. Even if she never comes back, I will _never_ be with you."

He opened his eyes to see Ayame's retreating form before he released the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding.

 _I'm sorry, Ayame_.

And he was. Kouga wanted to want Ayame. It wasn't like she was bad to look at. He just didn't want her. Love was never that simple and mating for the sake of honor would only hurt them both in the end.


	2. Chapter 1: Longing

Coming Home

Chapter 1

This was the worst thing.

The worst thing was finding out InuYasha had died in battle just a few weeks before her return. She had not been able to return to the Feudal Era for three years. The well hadn't worked for three years and she finally got back, and InuYasha was dead. Perhaps it was naïve but she always believed that he was invincible.

Kagome learned that day, as she hugged Shippou to her chest for dear life, that anyone can die in battle, even InuYasha.

 _Just a few weeks before._ If only she had been a month earlier, she would have been able to see him again. Perhaps things would have turned out differently. Perhaps they could have loved each other.

 _But now…_

Unable to staunch her grief, Kagome returned home and didn't visit the well house for 5 years.

In fact, she hadn't planned on visiting the well ever again. The pain that laced her heart after learning of InuYasha's passing was but a quiet pricking in her chest now. She supposed the pain might not have been so bad if she hadn't loved him… or thought she had. She had only been 15 at the time and incredibly naïve, but she was certain… She had spent 3 years pining to see him again, only to find he wouldn't be there to greet her at the well ever again. She spent the first year mourning his death as she navigated university, and spent the next handful turning away the advance of every male who crossed her path. _I'm not seeing anyone right now_. Or _I'm focusing on my studies_. Which wasn't a lie; Nursing school was difficult. She just couldn't see life intertwined with any boy or her tangled heart any more complicated than it was now.

She filled her off time with archery and reading. She got up early and ran before the sun rose and on nights when she couldn't sleep, she painted or baked bread to share with her friends.

Yet she struggled even in her studies to find meaning in any of it. She had gone to school to become a nurse, finding this to be the perfect distraction and use of her talents. How she would have yearned to have this knowledge back in the Feudal Era. Still, Kagome graduated with honors and on time.

Kagome laid her certificate of graduation on her bedside table. She had moved out of her grandfather's home after finding it to be too stifling and the well too much of a temptation.

After everything, Kagome had plenty reason to feel proud of all her accomplishments and adjusting to regular life after her time in the past. However, she could not shake the unease in her stomach nor the feeling of emptiness. Of longing.

She was freshly out of nursing school, young and accomplished, yet she felt something missing from her life.

Kagome thought about the well frequently and her time spent in the Feudal Era. Would the well even work anymore? She felt sick with nervousness and buried it.

As she rested her head for sleep, she did her best to calm the excitement in her heart.

She was decided.

 _It probably won't even work_.

When Kagome visited her family, nobody was even home. So Kagome left a note.

 _Mom. Be back later. Went to visit some old friends. Kagome._

She walked down to the well house that held the family well, she felt sweat on the palms of her hand. Bravely, she hitched her quiver of bows and arrow on her shoulder and backpack and opened the door to the well.

The door creaked as it revealed the well just as she remembered it.

 _Miroku and Sango's children will be older_.

 _Miroku and Sango will be older._

 _And Shippou._

Kagome bit down on her lip and leaned over the lip of the well. She felt the brush of magic blow against the threads of hair that had escaped her low braid pleated against her shoulder.

And without thinking about her family or thinking about school or finding a job, she let herself fall right into the well and didn't look back.

 _I'm going home_.


	3. Chapter 2: Returning

Coming Home

Chapter 2

Once on the other side, Kagome threw her backpack over the other side of the well and then climbed out. The forest that surrounded the well was void of a single creature.

 _I made it._

 _I'm actually here._

 _I'm really here._

Then briefly, she thought, _Inuyasha…_

Kagome felt a lump rise in her throat and scolded herself for the tears that formed.

 _Don't be stupid now. Inuyasha won't be here to greet you._

 _You're being stupid._

 _Emotional and stupid._

She turned and walked the short distance to Kaede's hut only to find the village empty. She knocked on the door of the old priestesses hut only to have it give with a creak. Previous experience taught her to wait for ambush. When she heard nothing, she peered through the door and listened for any noise, to find the home empty except for a small note inscribed with writing that could only be her former demon exterminator's.

 _Kagome,_

 _Lady Kaede passed a short while back. Everyone is healthy and well. Shippo misses you. After much discussion, we made home elsewhere and wanted to leave this in the happenstance that you came back. I hope wherever you are that you are happy. We love you. -S_

The bit of paper crinkled as Kagome clutched the small scroll to her chest. Hot, heavy tears fell from her eyes effortlessly and she wept bitterly and happily for her friends who were _healthy and well_.

Shippo must be a full fledged fox demon by now. Sango and Miroku's daughters would be nearly 7 years old and their baby would be 5 years old. Definitely no longer a baby.

Kagome wondered if Sango had other kin. Would she ever get the chance to meet or know them? Would she ever see them again?

A stab of pain shot through her heart like an arrow. She almost laughed at the irony. That couldn't be. They couldn't have gone _that_ far.

 _But where could they be?_

Kagome thought about going home and giving up as she sat in the small, familiar hut, but she had always been anything if not annoyingly persistent. Giving up just wasn't her style.

She had lost the only man she had ever loved, her dearest friends and did not feel like she belonged at home.

Where else would she go?

With strength she didn't know she had, Kagome furiously wiped the betraying tears off her face and trodded out of the hut and into the forest. She was going to find her friends.

Living off the land wasn't all that hard. She had learned a lot the short time she had been with Inuyasha and the others. Like which berries were poisonous and which leaves were poison Ivy. She was thankful for the knowledge she had.

Kagome's big break happened when she found an apple tree brimming with fresh fruit. She climbed the tree and dropped several of them to the ground below hoping they wouldn't bruise too much. She filled herself and then put the rest in her backpack for safe keeping.

She spent sixteen days traveling on foot without seeing another person. Hell, what she would give to see just another demon.

Kagome bathed when she could, basking in the occasional hot spring and grinning and baring it in the frigid lakes when she didn't have any other options. She killed infrequently when she could find vegetables, roots or fruit to satiate her hunger. She wasted nothing and lived off the land in a way she didn't know she was capable of doing until now.

If she had simply shown up alone on the other side of that well 8 years ago, she wasn't sure she would have been able to do it.

The weather had been nearly perfect during the day, if not a little chilly at night, but Kagome sought no reason to complain. If anything, the cold spirred her to keep moving.

 _Another cold spring_. Kagome undressed quickly and approached the small lake feeling unclean. The morning she had killed a small bird for her meal, and while feeling satisfied, her hands felt dirty. Figuring it was better not to drag out the torture, she quickly walked into the lake and began cleaning herself. She dunked under the water for a few seconds and popped back up, feeling the tension leave her aching muscles. Kagome traveled long distances every day.

She slept when she was able to find shelter, mostly in caves or trees. She had started to climb trees at night, and used a rope to wrap around herself so she couldn't fall to the ground below. She may be older and stronger and smarter than she was at 15 years old, but she still had nothing but herself to protect her.

Her bow and arrow, her knife, her long legs that could outrun almost anything would mean absolutely nothing if she were attacked in her sleep.

On the 16th day of her travels, Kagome was weary having not seen a single soul and tired. She groaned through a stretch, massaging her back. Sleeping in a tree wasn't good for the back. What she would give to have her bed back or a companion. What her mother would do if she knew the kind of danger she put herself in being here alone.

Kagome assumed her mother had an idea of the dangers she risked here, but at the same time no idea at all. If she had known she had spent her days fighting off giant, incredibly dangerous and deadly demons on a near daily basis, she doubted her mother would let her return. What mother would?

Kagome snorted at the thought.

She thought about possibly walking forever and still not finding her friends, but the ache in her chest forced her to direct her thoughts elsewhere. That wouldn't happen.

Kagome came across a familiar area, she realized it to be the place that she'd first met the wolf demon Kouga and his brothers Ginta and Hakkaku. It was the place they had come across the Birds of Paradise. She looked over the side of the banks to the rushing river below. It was unquestionable.

She smiled at the memory of the overly cocky boy she knew, running around telling everyone that she was _his_. She supposed it wouldn't have been so bad, partnering up with such a demon, if it weren't for his embarrassing forwardness or the fact that she was entirely convinced she was in love with InuYasha at the time. Kouga was loyal and kind hearted and had said he had loved her.

Kagome sighed inwardly. She thought she had known what love was and as much as she did not want to think ill of the deceased, Kagome had been given more time than she ever wanted to consider her relationship with Inuyasha. He had been kind in his actions when it came to her safety, but frequently downright rude and distant when it came to affection or even speaking to her kindly. She vaguely remembered his tears after she was poisoned and pour Shippo who had done everything he could to keep her, Sango and Miroku alive. Even more, she remembered his calls of _wench_ and _idiot_.

Was that love? Was that even a relationship? She scolded herself for thinking anything but fond memories of the dead.

 _Am I even remembering it right?_ Kagome thought anxiously.

Would Inuyasha have been different if he were still alive? Would he have stopped behaving so childishly and pushing her away?

Again, Kagome sighed. There was no use thinking about that. Pain would only come from those thoughts.

…In the meantime, Kouga had stood waiting on the sidelines for her to accept his advances, but she had only been a teenager. A teenager who thought she had known what love was…

 _It wouldn't have been so bad to be loved by him._

Again, she smiled at the memories, praying that wherever Kouga was that he too was happy and had grown up.


	4. Chapter 3: Familiar

Author Note: This is where things start to pick up and this chapter is a bit longer than the rest. Enjoy and thanks for reading!

It was midday when Kagome made camp at the ground where she had first seen the Bird of Paradise, and the first thing she did was take a dip in the spring nearby. It wasn't as cold as all the other springs she'd come across, and so she lingered a bit longer than she normally would have.

Feeling clean, she rung her long ebony locks out once more before dressing in spare clothes. Khaki slacks that fit neat to her ankle and easily tucked into her walking boots and green blouse, the color of the forest. It was long sleeved and practical for gallivanting through the Feudal Era, if one could call what she was doing _gallivanting_.

She snorted. She pulled out a book she'd brought with her giving time for her clothes to dry that she'd washed before packing them away. When her hair had dried a bit, she braided her damp hair into a pleat again. It was just easier than fussing with loose hair. Kagome took a deep breath before surveying her surroundings once more.

 _Nothing_.

It was quiet.

 _At least the sun was warm today._

Kagome pulled an apple out of her bag and began to feed the gnawing stomach that demanded food. She finished quickly, tossing the carcass into the bushes. She rested her back to survey the sky, making shapes out of the clouds. She would close her eyes for just a moment.

She wasn't even that tired.

She was just relaxing her eyes.

Resting up before she continued her trek for Sango and the others.

She had only closed her eyes for what felt like a moment when she felt a shadow looming over her and a familiar presence above her. Fear crept within her belly anyway.

 _Play dead. Play dead and whoever it is will go away…_

 _Or they'll crack my skull open before they go…_

 _Play dead, play dead, play dead._

Her eyes popped open at the sound of her name.

 _No way._

 _It can't be._

That deep voice she had heard a thousand, no, a million times. She would know his voice anywhere and now her eyes opened on command to the sound. She considered that perhaps it was only because she was so starved for another human.

 _ **Or perhaps part of you always starved for him. But you didn't… let yourself entertain it… because of**_ **him…**

 _Oh my gods, that's ridiculous!_

Kagome chided her brain for it's temporary loss of sanity.

Above her the figure eclipsed the bright sky around them. Sure as she knew her own name, her long lost wolf demon Kouga crouched before her, his hair loose from the ponytail she remembered, it making a curtain around them.

"Kouga?" she managed to whisper, her throat rough from lack of use. She reached up to touch his face to which he yanked out of her reach, as if she might burn him.

 _Please don't go!_

Other than his hair loose from its normal ponytail, he looked exactly the same. It had to be him.

 _Unless…_

 _Is my mind playing tricks on me?_

 _No…_

Her heart tugged in her chest, tears already filling the corners of her eyes as he stood to his feet, away from her. Unsure.

Sapphire blue eyes, long dark hair, tanned skin, masculine features. Her eyes fell to his hands. The very same hands that had wrapped her up in his arms, held her own hands, protected her from danger, vowed to love only her forever.

 _Kouga_. She knew it was him. He had to remember her. He just had to!

He had said her name after all.

Her heart raced as he reached his hand out to pull her to a standing position. Her eyes trailed from his hand to his eyes again and back down. She stared far too long and in the end, took his hand in hers as he yanked her up.

Memories flooded her as she searched his face for something, any sign that he remembered her. She was dying for him to speak, but he stood stoic and still, his face hard.

"Kouga." Lamely, she couldn't think of anything else to say. She expected him to hug her fiercely but he stood still in front of her.

He continued to say nothing, staring at her as if not comprehending who she was. Did he not remember her? Surely that couldn't be. His eyes were so strange. Glassy. It was as if he was looking right through her, into her.

Kagome feared a moment longer that the well had screwed up and brought her to the wrong time in the Feudal Era or that it had removed all trace of her, all memory of her, that perhaps Kouga would not remember her at all.

The thought alone filled her with overwhelming misery and she bit her lip to keep back the sob in her throat, her teeth nearly breaking the skin.

After what felt like an eternity, gently – so gently – she felt the wolf demon's arms encircle her, pulling her into him and then locking her in a tight embrace . His nose pressed into her hair, breathing deep like a man suffocated of air.

Kagome's hands rose in the air like a fugitive caught. She didn't dare move or breathe for fear he would disappear from her sight for good.

A thousand thoughts tumbled out at once.

 _This could be the goodbye he never got._

 _He could be angry._

 _He could crush me in half if he wanted._

 _He's so… hot._

 _But he won't._

 _He's being so… tender._

 _Kouga, Kouga, Kouga._

 _It's you, it's you, it's you._

"Kagomeeee…" He drew out her name that rumbled through his chest. The way he said her name made tears form in her eyes and something pulse in her abdomen.

He remembered her! He knew her!

She realized that she didn't want to go on not hearing it for another eight years. Or longer. She thought about the well closing up again. It seemed to have a mind of it's own. Suddenly, she felt sick.

Kagome thought perhaps she could go every day hearing him say her name like that, and she laughed at her own loneliness. As much as she knew Kouga had loved her, she knew he had pride even if it came to her. Kouga wouldn't be second best. He deserved better than a woman who desired him simply because she was lonely.

The way he held her made her want to stay, but she left her hands frozen in the air and let him take gulps of air of her scent, to take what he needed to be alright.

Kagome considered that it was the wolf in him that made her react so strongly. She didn't pretend to understand wolf politics or rules, but she knew that when a wolf demon interacted with his intended mate…. Though if she was his intended when she was 15, she wondered what difference now made.

 _Because now you aren't fighting it._

 _Because there is no one to eclipse him from your sight._

She blushed and pushed that thought aside.

 _How could I have ever been so stupid?_

Whatever anyone wanted to say about Kouga, no could have ever denied his devotion to her from the moment he met her. The things he would say would make her school girl friends swoon immediately.

"It's you," he finally said, his voice rough with emotion. "I picked up your scent days ago, but I thought it was my mind playing tricks on me." He added with sadness in his voice, "After all this time."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. Her arms dropped, returning his embrace and wrapped her arms around him, gliding through his long hair. "I know that I left without much of an explanation."

"Eight years is a long time," he said quietly, his fingers strumming through the loose pieces of her hair, hanging from her braid.

 _Eight years._ Kagome had left him without any trace of her for eight years. How cruel do you get?

Kagome released the sob that burst from her lungs as a cough, fighting back more tears.

Even though he'd never been her lover, they had been somewhat good friends after everything they went through. Even if the first time returning home had been out of her control, the second time she didn't even bother seeking him out.

She had no idea how worried he had been. He knew Inuyasha's death must have been hard on her, but he didn't understand why she had left without any reason.

"You are… older," Kouga said carefully. "Taller." _Filled out_ , he wanted to add, but he bit his tongue as he held onto Kagome. He was still a man, but he wasn't as crass as he had been years before. Kagome had taught him some things about how to treat a woman.

Kagome couldn't help but release a joyous laugh from her chest. She couldn't remember the last time she had laughed.

"Well, you look exactly the same!" she said, leaning back enough to shove his arm playfully. He grinned wolfishly at her, his bright blue eyes twinkling. He did. He looked exactly the same. She realized that demons aged much slower than humans, but just how much?

Kouga's body, the most noticeable thing about him, hadn't changed much at all. He was still a foot taller than her and lean with the muscle of a warrior, of a man. He wore the same fur around his hips, wrists and ankles, and she noticed that his armor was gone, leaving his chest bare. She kept herself from ogling too much and brought her eyes back to his face.

"You still smell the same," Kouga noted, his eyes still parading over her lithe figure. She had grown so much from the young girl he knew. "You're older, but it's… good."

Kagome bit her lip to suppress a giggle. _Slick, Kouga ._ She felt the loss of his warmth, no longer in his arms.

"What's brought you back here?" he asked distantly. "Surely you didn't return to catch up with an old wolf."

Ouch.

 _He's preparing for me to leave. Already…_

 _Of course he would._

 _Oh, Kouga…_

Kagome cleared her throat. Of course he would question this after InuYasha died. What reason would she have to come back?

Her body practically vibrated with the urge to reach out and step into his embrace again, to touch his face, to tell him how sorry she was.

"Would you believe me if I told you – " _I wanted to see you again_. "– I was bored?" Kagome kicked a pebble next to her boot.

Kagome tried to remember the reason she had come. Sango, Miroku, Shippo. That was why she had come. Not for Kouga. Still…

Kouga chuckled gazing deeply into her eyes, waiting for something. For her to leave? "Dammit, woman, you better not be a mirage."

Kagome felt shy all of the sudden. "Where are you traveling to?" she asked conversationally. "I don't want to keep you from it."

Kouga shook his head. "Just patrolling the lands. I'm still the leader of the Wolf Tribe in the East. Even though the Shikon Jewel is gone, there are still demons and I have my people to protect."

"Oh," she said quietly.

InuYasha died in battle and he was strong. Kouga was strong, too. The thought of him being hurt in battle made her heart clench in an unreasonable fashion and she reached up to massage her hand against the dull ache in her chest. It didn't help.

 _Too much._

The idea of him going back to his home without her or the fact that she never thought she would see him again was unbearable. And it was completely unreasonable for her to feel this way.

He _was_ going to leave. Right? That was inevitable.

"I don't want to not see you again," she muttered.

"Kagome?"

"Are you looking for company? That is… Could I… Would you…" she stumbled over her words and took a deep breath. She huffed, annoyed with herself. This was just Kouga.

 _ **A very primal, handsome looking Kouga. A man that in spite of everything clearly still has feelings for you.**_

 _Stop it!_

Kagome almost slapped herself and forced her eyes to make contact with his. His beautiful blue eyes.

 _Worse. That's worse._

Kagome had not escaped the Feudal Era not knowing that her wolf friend was impossibly good looking, a Modern Day Adonis. At the time she had devoted her heart to another. Had she really been this blind?

"Kagome, what is it?"

Even his voice called to her, homed in on every sense in her body, made her fingers and toes tingle with energy, with want to touch him again. She could have thrown herself at his feet, but stayed standing. It didn't make any sense.

She sighed and closed her eyes. _There, that was better._ "Would you take me with you?" Inwardly she cringed. That didn't come out the way she wanted.

His ears perked up at this.

 _She wants to come with me_.

Ayame's shrill voice taunted his memory. _She isn't going to come back._ Kouga dared to hope again as the woman of his dreams stood before him, very real, very much back.

"I figure that you have more questions to ask me," Kagome said as an excuse, tucking a lose strand of her hair behind her ear hoping he wouldn't see through her. "And I can protect myself better now."

Though his actions said otherwise, she prepared for him to say no. She prepared for him to fully reject her.

Kouga laughed, folding his arms over his chest. "Is that so?"

"I'd like to see the others, as well," she added. "Ginta, Hakkaku, how are they?"

Kouga grunted in response. "Hnn, they're same as always. Idiots."

Kagome smiled at the thought of seeing more old friends.

He picked up her bag and handed it to her. "Get your things."

So that's it then, they were leaving. He was taking her with him.

"Kouga?" His wolf pulsed at the sound of her using his name in a way that it hadn't in years. Not since she left.

He paused to look back at her over his shoulder."Yes?"

She blushed prettily. "It's nothing really. I'm just glad it's you and that you're here. With me." She added, "I haven't seen anyone in two weeks."

Kagome sighed, feeling content to have found an old friend.

"Come on, Kagome. It'll be dark by the time we get back."


	5. Chapter 4: Friend

_I can't get over you.  
You left your mark on me..._

 _You're a good girl and you know it  
You act so different around me.  
You're a good girl and you know it  
I know exactly who you could be.  
Just hold on, we're going home.  
– Drake, Hold On We're Going Home _

Chapter 4

The sun was setting and it painted the sky with pinks and oranges. It was a long walk back to the wolf dens and Kagome had already spent much of the day walking before Kouga showed up. Even though her legs practically howled for rest, she would not complain.

Kouga didn't touch her the entire walk back to the the wolf grounds, and kept his eyes on the path ahead of them. This was very unlike the touchy feely wolf demon Kagome had once known, who had taken every opportunity to embrace her, to hold her hand, to run his hand through her hair, to say sweet nothing's to her. In fact, his embrace from earlier spoke more of the old wolf demon than the air about him now.

 _Perhaps he has matured…_ Kagome thought absently, proudly. A smile private smile graced her lips.

 _Or perhaps he doesn't feel that way about me anymore._

 _I don't blame him._

 _It's been years and it's not like he owes me anything._

 _What if he mated with Ayame? That should make me happy. I should be happy for Kouga._

 _And why am I even questioning his feelings? Why are they of importance to me? Do I…_

 _Do I have feelings for Kouga?_

The silence was broken by the wolf demon walking alongside her. "You said that after you left you couldn't come back through the well," Kouga said, though more as a question. "What do you mean?"

Kagome knew that Kouga had some idea of how she _returned to her village_ , but couldn't quite grasp the concept. How did it work? Was it magic? Was it Kagome? Like her feelings and everything that had transpired in this era, it was complicated.

She chose her words carefully. "The well… it stopped working," she answered, pulling on her sleeve of her green top. "The well that I had used for so long to return home and back here closed off. It wouldn't let me come back no matter how much I tried." They walked without touching and Kagome focused on the trees up ahead, counting them. "And I tried. A lot."

Kagome had tried every day for nearly six months, and then once a week, and then she wasn't sure when she stopped trying altogether. She wasn't sure when visiting her mother and grandfather had started to feel like pulling teeth.

 _What had changed between now and then?_ Kagome thought about how long the well might close up this time. How long would she have to wait for it to allow her back through?

Kouga was silent, begging for her to continue.

"It took me three years before I could return and InuYasha wasn't even…. He was dead. Unable to think of anything other than my own grief, I left again and I didn't return until a couple of weeks ago. I couldn't," she finished staring at the dirt beneath her feet as they walked, afraid to see the progression of hurt in Kouga's face.

 _I didn't even look for you. I'm sorry, Kouga._

"You were here… once before? Before now."

Kagome glanced at him briefly and he only looked thoughtful.

"Mm-hm."

"You loved him," Kouga concluded thoughtfully.

Kagome sighed, the tiny pang in her chest throbbed but no longer crippled her. "I don't know," she said, shaking her head, hoisting her bow on her back as she did. "I think that I did."

 _I loved you, too_ , he thought, but again bit his own tongue. Not the right time to speak such a thing, even if it was true. Even if it was still true.

Kagome shrugged, adding, "I guess it's not important though. He's dead."

 _And I'm not. I'm still here, Kagome._

"What made you come back?" he asked.

Kagome glanced up at him. If he was hurt by anything she had shared, he wasn't showing it.

Kagome sighed. "I wanted to see my friends again. Sango, Miroku, Shippo."

"The demon slayer, the monk, and the kitsune," Kouga remembered aloud.

"Uh-huh. But they've gone away."

"So you came looking for them," Kouga stopped upruptly, holding his arm out to stop Kagome. "Then why do you want to come with me? Kagome, it isn't that I am not," he chose his words carefully, " _happy_ to see you again, but please don't stick around on account of –" _my unwavering, completely inappropriate feelings for you_ , "me. You should go find your friends." It hurt him immensely to say all of this. He didn't want her to leave and the words felt like acid on his tongue.

His inner wolf was barely restrained, demanding he take it back. _Tell her not to leave. Tell her to stay. Make her_ _ **stay**_ _!_ Kagome missed the red flash in his eyes.

 _ **MAKE HER STAY**_ _._

Everything about turning around and walking away from Kouga felt wrong. Her legs felt like cement. He was asking her to go.

 _No! I'm not ready to go._

 _Why Kouga_?

"I haven't forgotten my friends. I just," she bit her lip. "I wanted to see you." _And figure out these strange feelings_.

Kagome knew exactly how Kouga felt about her. Or thought she did when he made every opportunity to tell her years ago. But did that mean that she knew him or how he felt now?

Kouga chuckled and closed his eyes to her. "Kagome, you know how I feel about you. Don't..." he trailed off bitterly. He wouldn't admit weakness in front of her. "Don't make this harder than it needs to be."

Kagome felt hurt that her wolf demon would suggest she would be here with dishonest intentions.

"I don't understand. Can't I want to visit with a friend?" Kagome practically rolled her eyes at herself. _Really Kagome?_

 _A friend_.

 _You're insane._

 _Kouga was never just your friend._

Kagome was no longer the naïve fifteen year old teenager since she had last seen her wolf demon. Kouga frequently blurred the line of friends, if he didn't obliterate it entirely. The only thing to ever get in the way had been Inuyasha, and it usually ended with both canines foaming at the mouth over her.

Kouga was not _not_ her friend. There wasn't quite a word for what he was, but _friend_ did not describe Kouga at all. His ideals and the way that men claimed other women as their mates seemed entirely barbaric compared to Kagome's time, but something about Kouga's advances after the time she had slapped him was quieter and louder all at once. Kouga pursued Kagome with fervor and showered her with kindness that was meant to sway her.

It should have. She knew why it hadn't. Of course she knew why it hadn't.

 _Was I really so blind sighted?_

… _Friend._

Meanwhile, Kouga was at war with his wolf.

 _Make her see she isn't your friend. MAKE HER SEE._

Kouga ground his teeth together and told his inner wolf to stand down. His fists clenched at his sides.

The argument Kouga had with Ayame by the lake replayed in his mind.

' _You know what's really pathetic? She doesn't even love you. When she was here, she chose that dog demon and you still chased her.'_

Kouga blinked his eyes open and took a few steps away from her so he was standing with his back facing her.

"Kagome, you know this has never been about _friends_ ," Kouga said, his voice low. "I didn't think I would see you again. I won't demand you to be my woman like I did so long ago, but I won't hide my feelings for you. You're not a child anymore and with..."

 _With my competition gone…._

Kouga peered over his shoulder. "Leave when you must, but I won't stop chasing you this time." He was resolute, there was no questioning it.

Kagome gasped. Her heart stuttered at his confession. There was the Kouga she knew. Forward as ever and straight to the point. Unyielding, definite and unforgiving in his affections for her.

Her face tinted pink.

He had confirmed her earlier thoughts. Kouga was absolutely right. This had never been about friends. Even with her eyes glued to Inuyasha, it had never been about friends. Nothing he had ever said or done had been friendly. Kouga had chased her, chased for her affection only for her to reject him, while the man she claimed to love rejected her for a dead priestess damned to hell.

 _We are not so different, he and I._

Kagome's face drained of color. She felt sick for how she had treated him. Guilt tapped into her veins with a slow drip, drip.

 _I could live a thousand lifetimes and not deserve you, Kouga-kun._

Before she could stop herself, she blurted out, "What feelings …exactly?"

Kagome watched him freeze. He didn't speak. He didn't even move except for clenching his fists at his side. A gentle breeze stirred the curtain of hair hiding his face. Should she have asked?

 _His hair really is beautiful_..

"Kagome, I know you don't return my feelings," he began. He shook his head with a sigh. There was no hint of pity in his voice. It was something she could tell he had accepted.

 _I don't know how I feel._

 _Do I?_

Kagome waited, worrying her lip.

"I don't think that's a door you want to open," he said, turning to look at her. The glassy look in his eyes returned. The seeing-right-into-you look.

Kagome shivered momentarily. With the sun setting, the air had turned cold, but she wasn't shaking from the temperature.

Kagome nodded, her lip popping from between her teeth. "Kouga, you don't owe me anything after the way I treated you. You were loving and kind and I was blinded by my feelings for Inu… for someone else that I couldn't see you." She took a tentative step forward and he retreated a step back. "For that I'll always be sorry. But as you said, I'm not a child anymore."

How had their conversation turned so serious so quickly?

 _How did we get here, huh, Kouga?_

"Please, I have to know."

"Why, Kagome?" Kouga asked finally. His once strong resolve was cracking like thin glass. If anything would break him, it would be Kagome. It would always be Kagome. "You know how I feel about you. Why are you going to make me say it?"

She grew desperate. "You don't have to, okay? You don't have to say it-" She took another step in his direction so that she was probably a foot from him. Without warning, Kouga stepped into her, his hand cradled her face, pressing into her hair, holding her there so he could gaze into her eyes.

 _Bad idea. Bad idea, Kagome!_

 _This is your friend, Kouga._

 _Friend, friend, friend._

Everything about him screamed animal, screamed wolf, screamed man.

Kagome knew she should stop this, but could not bring herself to step away. Why, she had no clue.

She placed her hands against his chest to put some distance between them if nothing else. At least that is what she told herself she was doing. She definitely wasn't doing it to see how it felt.

Kouga's eyes smoldered against hers as he held her face. His hand trailed from her cheek and pressed against the pulse of her throat that was pounding at an alarming rate.

He was pleased that she was affected by this, by him.

Then, Kagome wasn't sure when or how, but his other hand squeezed firmly around her hip, holding her close to him. Kagome gasped at the sensation it created and she did not miss the smirk of his lips.

He could not be closer.

 _Actually,_ Kagome reasoned. _He could be a lot closer._

Storms raged in his eyes and Kagome refused to back down. She owed him that.

She owed it to him to see how she felt.

So when his lips hovered over hers, a whisper of a touch, his breath warm on her face, she closed her eyes and waited for him to continue.

"My feelings for you have not changed, Kagome." When he spoke, Kagome felt the movement of his lips against hers and she whimpered.

 _He's going to kiss me._

She opened her eyes when a breeze brushed against her face. Kouga's warm hands retreated and her hands slipped from him as he moved away from her.

She found Kouga still gazing in her eyes, but he no longer held the heated look of a lover. She felt embarrassed by how easily she'd given in to him. At fifteen, she would have slapped him for such a move.

Right now, Kagome felt heated and realization hit her like a freight truck. She didn't want him to stop.

Not at all.

"Come," he said with a grin.. He turned to continue their path to his home. "We still have a ways to go."

She looked after him, dumb founded and had to shake her head to clear her head enough to process his command.

Keeping a distance behind him now, lost in her thoughts, Kagome came to a very real conclusion. She was going to let him kiss her. She would have let him kiss her and perhaps more had he made a move on her. Eight years ago, that Kagome would have made him sorry and Inuyasha would have ripped out his teeth, but Kagome was not fifteen anymore and Inuyasha was not there.


	6. Chapter 5: Confrontation

Author Note: I am churning these out. I had chapters 1-4 pretty much written for quite some time, but I haven't got around to posting it. There should be more chapters up next week as I'll be taking a break for the weekend. As for the Drake lyrics I quoted in Chapter 4, I highly recommend listening to Vancouver Sleep Clinic's version while reading that chapter. Anyway, here is Chapter 5.

Chapter 5

It was nightfall and the temperature had dropped significantly. Kagome could see her breath come out in small puffs of air and locked her jaw together to keep them from chattering. Kagome was exhausted.

Sometime during their journey back, Kouga had strung her bow and quiver of arrows over his shoulder. The weight removed helped immensely.

"H-how," she said, unable to control her jaw as it slammed her teeth together.

 _Well that didn't work._

She tried again. "K-kouga, how much f-further?"

He kept his pace. He hadn't touched her again or hardly looked at her since the incident earlier.

 _Smoldering Kouga_ had evaporated before her eyes and Kagome had to admit, she quite missed it. Though the quiet had been a nice break to sort out her head.

How did one sort of the things he had confessed to her. Kouga didn't play games, that was for sure.

 _I won't hide my feelings for you._

When had Kouga ever hid his feelings? Kagome pondered that perhaps after the Slap Heard Around the Den, Kouga never really hid his feelings, but had he held his true feelings back?

 _I won't stop chasing you this time._

Skip. Pass. There was no sorting that out.

 _My feelings for you have not changed, Kagome._

Kagome briefly touched her fingertips to her lips and blinked slowly.

"The den is just up here," Kouga nodded his chin forward, in answer.

Kagome stopped, jumping up and down, rubbing her hands up her arms trying to warm herself with little success.

"Okay I can't do this anymore," she said through chattering teeth. The tone in her voice made Kouga stop. "I'm freezing into an ice statue."

Gods, what she would give for a cup of hot chocolate or a hot spring right now.

Kouga turned to assess her. He never forgot that she was human, but it had escaped him that she must be cold. The dens were just up ahead and once they got back, he could start a fire and get her warmed up.

For now?

He couldn't bring her back to the den like this. As much as he wanted to give her space, his wolf wouldn't let Kagome freeze.

Kagome watched as he placed the palms of his hands against both sides of her neck.

 _Oh._

Kagome felt the burn of his hands against her icy skin and instinctively reached up to grab his hands around her neck to lap up more of his heat.

He was like having your own fire. Kagome wondered what her chances were of having him follow her on her journey to seek Sango and the others.

She looked up into his eyes but saw his face free of any grin or really any emotion at all. His actions were not to sway her or kiss her or hold her close. He was warming her, innocently enough.

Then why did her pulse race? She knew he had to sense it, feel it and it only made her heart race more.

The heat from Kouga's hands poured from the top of her neck and warmed her all the way down her spine. He pulled away when her teeth stopped chattering, the fingers of one hand trailing down the length of her pleated hair. His thumb brushed against the black hair band holding it together at the bottom.

Kouga could think of a few ways to warm Kagome, but he wasn't certain if she would be a willing participant. Yet.

He smiled down at her. "I like your hair like this."

Kagome glanced into his eyes and saw that they were practically glowing in the dark and she couldn't look away.

"I could braid yours for you if you like," she said fluidly.

 _Did I just say that?_

 _Am I flirting with Kouga?_

 _Well… what of it if I am?_

That thought left her both nervous and excited. His fingers slipped away.

Kouga snorted. "Come on," he said, his voice low. "It's just a bit further. I'll start a fire and get you warm."

"Little Sister!" Ginta was the first to greet her, shortly followed by Hakkaku. Much like Kouga, the two brothers had not changed one bit. It was like they were frozen in time.

Kagome leaned up on her tip toes. "Ginta! Hakkaku!" The urge to embrace her old friends was palpable but she could feel the tension rise as she stepped forward to greet them.

 _Oh, right. Wolves. Possession. Women._

Kagome nearly rolled her eyes. In the end she settled for a friendly wave.

The brothers and Kouga shared a secret look.

"How have you been?" Kagome asked the pair.

"Good, I guess," Hakkaku replied, anxiously running his hand over the back of his neck. "Things are a little quieter around here without demons fighting over jewel shards, ya know?"

Kagome nodded cheerfully. She did know.

"And Kouga keeps us plenty busy," Ginta chimed in. "No complaints here."

"It's good to see you both!"

"What brings you here?" Hakkaku asked, conversationally. She noticed both brothers were careful not to let their eyes linger on her for very long or anywhere but her eyes.

Kagome fished for words. Kouga was one thing, but how did she make them understand.

"I'm… I'm looking for the people I used to travel with," she said.

Hakkaku's eyebrows furrowed. "The hanyou?" he blurted out, but Ginta had already clapped a hand over his mouth and Kouga released a growl.

 _He's worried about me being hurt…_

Kagome sighed. "It's alright," Kagome offered. "I'm looking for the monk, the small fox demon, and the demon slayer."

 _But then Kouga showed up and derailed all my plans._

 _My plans not to feel anything for another man until I'm an old maid, that is._

"Are you hungry, Sister?" Ginta supplied helpfully. He had released Hakkaku who appeared sheepish. "There's dinner in the den," he added, looking at Kouga.

"Yes, I could eat," Kagome said lightly. Truth be told, she was starved. She remembered the last thing she'd eaten was an apple midday before Kouga had arrived.

"Glad to have you here, Little Sister," Hakkaku returned quietly.

The cold air assaulted her skin and her lungs every time she inhaled.

Kagome had nearly forgotten Kouga's presence until she felt his hand placed firmly on the small of her back.

"Kouga?"

"Hnn." He was guiding her forward, towards the den, where Kagome knew many of the wolves resided. Suddenly she was filled with panic.

"The others – they aren't going to – they remember I'm not food, right?"

Kouga growled at the thought of any of the other men even looking in her direction. "You're with me, Kagome. No one will touch you."

 _You're mine._

Kagome took a deep breath, trusting her wolf demon to protect her and walked with her chin up into the den. Most of the occupants were either asleep or laughing and playing together. Kagome recognized a few faces and sighed with relief.

"Well I have to admit, this is certainly the last thing I thought I would see," came a familiar voice.

 _Ayame._

 _Kouga's fiancée._

 _Or used to be fiancée?_

Kagome steeled herself and turned to face Ayame who stood at the entrance of the den, arms crossed over her chest. Just like the others, she hadn't changed much. Her hair no longer held childish pigtails, but flowed in waves down her back, leading in to womanly curves and long legs. Anyone in their right mind could see Ayame was beautiful.

Suddenly Kagome felt inadequate in comparison. Why would Kouga choose her over Ayame?

 _He must be out of his mind!_

"Hello Ayame," Kagome greeted, sounding braver than she felt. She was thankful her voice didn't betray her.

Ayame appraised Kagome's appearance with a sneer. "So tell us, are you here because that worthless hanyou isn't around anymore."

"Ayame!" Kouga barked.

Kagome forgot her hunger and the cold that still wrapped tightly around her.

Of course it would appear that way.

"Inuyasha died five years ago, Ayame," Kagome answered without an ounce of malice in her voice. "Why would I be here because of that?"

Ayame shrugged. "Beats me. Why _are_ you here?"

Kagome had to try very hard to keep her temper down. How dare she? "Because I want to be," she said through her teeth.

"Really?" Ayame scoffed. "Please. You probably want something from him and then you're going to leave again, am I right?"

 _I should put an arrow in her stupid head. The little brat._

Kagome knew Ayame resented her because of how Kouga felt about her. Kagome was hungry and cold and tired and not feeling kind.

"I know what it's like to have someone not return your feelings and for that I'm truly, sincerely sorry, Ayame, really, but I fail to see how that is my fault," Kagome answered brusquely.

The wolf demoness hardly seemed deterred. "You know," Ayame continued in a sing-song voice. "Kouga deserves better than your sloppy seconds."

Ayame picked at her nails as if she was bored. Kouga looked about ready to hang her by her throat.

"And fair warning, little human," Ayame looked right at Kagome. She punctuated every word, "I. Don't. Fight. Fair." Without another word, Ayame flipped her hair over her shoulder and walked into the den.

Kouga turned toward Ayame, reigning his self-control not to go snap Ayame's neck. She deserved as much.

Kagome dropped to her knees in front of the food. There was an assortment of fruits and cooked meats that appeared to be boar. She would gladly forget Ayame if it meant filling her stomach.

 _Bless you, Ginta._

Kouga appraised her, squatting beside her and picking up a plum. She had been confronted by Ayame and had held her ground when most other women might cower in Ayame's presence.

"Ayame doesn't know who she's messing with," Kagome said, between consuming the fruit in her lap. Kouga's laugh reverberated off the walls of the den and Kagome's anger for the wolf demoness fled.

"She doesn't, huh?" Kouga said, using his forearm to wipe the juice from his chin.

Kagome bit her lip and shook her head.

Kouga sat back from his heels and leaned against the wall of the den. He gazed at her fondly, brushing his hand against her hair near her temple.

"I missed you," he confessed tenderly, not missing the pretty blush of her cheeks. Kagome put back the piece of fruit she had been holding, silenced.

 _He has a knack for that._

 _Why Kouga? Why must you be so sweet?_

 _How am I ever supposed to resist you like this?_

Kagome reached up to hang on to the warm hand brushing against her cheek and through her loose braid.

"Kouga, I…"

Painfully, she thought about the last 8 years. She had thought about Kouga, but probably not as much as she should have. She missed him but the full force of it had not hit her until his arrival. It was funny the things your mind will forget about in order to protect the heart.

She sat beside him, thinking about tucking into him to absorb his warmth. She was so cold and it seemed to pour off of him.

Kouga regarded her with his bright blue eyes and it was hard to look away but Kagome did it. She couldn't fall into his spell, not when she needed him to know something so important.

 _If only he would stop touching me._

 _No, don't stop doing that._

 _It feels lovely and I'm an ice box._

"Kouga, have you rejected Ayame because of… because of how you feel about me?"

 _Stupid, stupid, stupid._

 _Insert foot in mouth._

Kagome grimaced as she realized what she had said.

Kouga sighed, still looking at her. "I rejected Ayame because as you said, I don't return her feelings," he said without missing a beat. He meant it. "It has nothing to do with you, I promise."

Kagome couldn't help leaning in to his hand, nor the smile that graced her lips now.

"I missed you, too."


	7. Chapter 6: Cold

Kagome was never really a swept off your feet kind of girl, but after wandering for sixteen days through woods and village after village, and sleeping in trees and small caves, she didn't fight Kouga when he scooped her up in his arms. She leaned against his bare chest but was otherwise a rag doll in his arms.

"Hmm…" Kagome sighed in her half asleep state.

Kouga grinned, knowing what had caused that quiet noise. He held her closer, breathing in her scent while she was there in his arms. "Kagome?"

She snuggled closer to his chest and his wolf swelled with pride. _I comfort her._

"You're just…" She paused for so long he thought perhaps she had fallen asleep, until she added, "really warm."

She went on. "If a human's body ran that hot, our brains would start to melt."

He knew as a wolf demon that his temperature ran a lot higher than perhaps a human might. He anticipated that a lot of things might be different compared to a human, but still he couldn't imagine a human brain melting like ice.

Kouga continued the short path to his quarters, a closed off area from the rest of the pack.

He nodded, pressing his lips to her forehead. She was ice. This would not do. "And you are freezing solid. I don't know what I'm going to do with you."

The small girl in his arms was practically drunk with fatigue. She sighed into his shoulder and Kouga felt her warm breath on his neck.

Kagome's small hand pressed against his chest, no doubt lapping up more of his heat. "I bet you could do something about that."

 _She's flirting with me_!

 _She's almost asleep but she is flirting with me._

She was right. He could. There was plenty he could think of to warm her up. While his mind went elsewhere, Kouga would be a gentleman with her in his arms.

Once back to his quarters, he placed her on his furs in the center of the room. Kouga counted her heartbeats and the slow inhale, exhale of her breathing. Yep, she was definitely asleep.

Kouga would have tried to kiss her again, or at the very least carried on flirting with her had she not fallen asleep. He resided and sat down close beside her, his back to the den wall to watch her sleep. He was close enough to protect her, but not enough for her to lap up his heat anymore.

He watched her shiver and swallowed the hard lump in his throat. His wolf longed to protect, to keep her warm, to simply hold her, and Kouga knew a large part of him wanted that, too.

As Kagome slept, curled tight in his furs, he knew that it was a miracle that she had come back, that she was home in his den, sleeping safely a foot or so away, full and happy. He wouldn't think about her leaving just yet. He knew she would leave eventually, unless he could convince her to stay..

This did not seem entirely impossible with her already responding in kind to his physical touch, enough to make her whimper at even the promise of his touch, his kiss.

His mind went back to their journey to the den when he had almost tasted those sweet lips of hers. His veins had burned with the urge to kiss her, a carnal need to take, to protect, to claim. He had not known if he would see Kagome again and he wasn't sure how long it would have been or where he would have stopped, but he felt it would not have simply ended with kissing.

He had not missed when she had touched her delicate fingers to her lips, clearly reminiscing about their almost kiss. Just from her reaction alone, he discerned that she would have let him kiss her and his wolf purred in delight. What did a little game of cat and mouse hurt anyone?

Before exhaustion had washed over her, Kagome had asked if there was a hot spring close by. His mind went to a vision of her undressed in a warm body of water. The curve of her breasts, the flat of her stomach, the swell of her hips that trailed down into long legs. He would pull her flush against him, running his clawed hands, touching her where she craved him most. When she couldn't stand his teasing touches anymore, she would ask for him to take her, and he would take her again and again until they were both satisfied. He would make her so dizzy with desire, bring her over the edge again and again, her screams puncturing the air.

Kouga would mate her.

Newly mated lovers sometimes didn't leave their dens for weeks. Aside from sleep and food that humans needed, the love making wouldn't stop.

His wolf seemed to yank him forward, but he pressed his back against the wall of the den, unmoving. He would control himself for her. For how long he didn't know, but he knew she felt it too. The pull, the almost physical drag to be close to one another.

The first time Kouga had seen her, he had felt the very same but not understood it. Then when Kagome rejected him for the recently deceased hanyou, he had buried the feeling, taking what he could from their short reunions, a hand touch here, an embrace there. He wasn't sure how he had survived the last eight years without her.

Ayame would be dealt with and harshly, tomorrow. She had disrespected his woman and that could not be stood for. He was Alpha and even if she disagreed with his love interests, she had to respect him. For the pack and Kagome's sake, he refrained from snapping Ayame's all too fragile neck. For now.

It was late. Kouga was so deep in thought he didn't notice when his eyes slipped close, surrendering to sleep.

Kouga's eye popped open to his dimly lit den. What had woken him was the scent of his beloved, much closer than where he had last left her. He found that she was nestled against him in their sort of sitting upright position, her ear pressed against his chest. She had kept her hands to herself, tucked into herself.

Kagome felt like a thief caught red handed with her hand stuck in the cookie jar. She didn't know what else to do when she woke up freezing with salvation just a few feet away. She would blame it on sleep in the morning.

 _What am I doing? I can't use Kouga like this._

Kagome had denied the hand of every suitor who presented themselves to her and forwent courtship, welcoming loneliness instead. She knew that it was not fair to be intimate with Kouga because she was tired of being lonely.

 _Are you sure that's the only reason though?_

 _Are you sure that it's not your attraction to him? That perhaps you too have feelings for him?_

Kouga was a good man. He was loyal to a fault, long suffering in his love for her, patient, kind, good, and would protect her if it meant his own life. Add to that, he was incredibly handsome and very much still attracted to her.

She had no idea just how far his attraction went, deep rooted love for her that he would make known every moment of her short existence once the time was right.

So what did one do with their hand caught in the cookie jar? She could feign sleep but he could sense her heartbeat, so that was a pass. She could blame it on sleep, but what did it matter really why she was in his arms now other than she was cold and honestly wanted to be.

"I woke you," she apologized.

Kouga roused immediately, lifting her lightly in his arms. "It's no matter," he replied, his voice rough with sleep. "I'm strong. I don't need sleep."

He set Kagome gently back on the furs.

Kagome scoffed lightly. Kouga felt her hand touch his cheek and he leaned into her cold touch. His noise pressed into her scent that invigorated every nerve in his body like a livewire. He reached up and pressed the palm of his hand against hers and inhaled sharply.

"Everyone needs rest," she said, her voice shaking a little with nervous energy. "Even strong demon like you."

She took her hand back and rested her head back on the furs that made up Kouga's bed.

 _Gods, she's so beautiful._

"Y'know, it's not the same," Kagome said, blushing in the dark. She couldn't believe she was saying this, but she was going to freeze otherwise.

Kouga settled beside her but his sudden movement struck fear in her that he would leave her to chill on the furs. The furs were warming but not enough. She gripped his forearm in her tiny hand.

"Please Kouga, I'm so cold."

Kouga coaxed her back down on the furs and settled beside her. "I know, forgive me." His arms wrapped around her, locking her in his warm embrace, rushing the cold away. "I'm gonna make it better."

Kagome was horrified when she felt the rush of hot tears spill out of her eyes. Kouga scented the salt in the air and felt the wetness from her face. _Tears_.

"Kagome, you're crying. Are you hurt?"

She shook her head, using the sleeve of her blouse to sop up the big fat tears that would not stop falling.

 _Stupid tears._

 _Stupid emotions._

 _Stupid hormones._

 _Stupid, stupid, stupid._

"It's nothing. I just –" Kagome wasn't even sure why she was crying when it hit her full force, a sucker punch right in the gut, but it staunched her tears like shutting off a faucet.

 _I missed him. I missed this. Well, not this exactly, but I missed him._

"Are you unhappy?" She closed her eyes, relaxing as his fingers brushed through her hair, careful not to undo the loose braid.

Kagome shook her head again. Definitely not.

"No."

 _Quite the opposite actually_

Kagome felt the need to make certain he understood that very truth _._

"You aren't sad?" he asked, still unsure as her tears stopped.

"Sometimes humans cry when they're happy," Kagome tried to explain.

She wondered briefly if demon ever cried, if perhaps Kouga had ever shed tears.

Kouga wouldn't even try to understand that, but he listened anyway.

"So, you are crying because you're happy. With me."

Kagome thought about it. She sighed.

"I'm happy, but it isn't really why I'm crying, I…"

Kouga waited. Finally she met his gaze in the dark room.

"It's so stupid," she whispered.

 _ **Oh, you**_ love _**him, don't you?**_ her mind goaded.

 _No. That's ridiculous. How do you fall in love someone in less than a day?_

It didn't make any sense. But then again, Kagome had known Kouga for many years, spent time in this very den, fought alongside him to defeat demons and Naraku, had nearly died at his side on more than one occasion. How would one not come to _love_ someone in some way having gone through what they shared? Even if that love was buried deep down, overshadowed by another…. It didn't mean it wasn't there, hadn't been there the whole time.

"What?" he pressed gently.

 _I can't. I can't tell him that._

 _Not now. Not until I'm sure._

 _And there's still the matter of finding Sango and Miroku and Shippo._

"I was crying because I just.. I realized how much I missed you is all…" she muttered, pressing her against his chest to sleep, suddenly feeling very tired and very shy. It wasn't untrue.

"You missed me and that made you cry?" She felt the rumble of his voice through his ribcage and his embrace tighten around her.

Kagome nodded, her eyes feeling heavy again. "Yes."

"But you aren't sad?"

"No, I suppose I'm not. Anymore."

Author Note: I'm sorry this isn't longer, but I needed to end it here or this chapter would have been muuuuuch longer. Anyway, thank you for the kind reviews, follows and favorites. You all sure know how to make a cinnybun feel loved. If no one's told you today, you are awesome and I believe in you. See you soon!


	8. Chapter 7: Hunting

**Author Note** : Your reviews literally bring me such joy. I adore you all and I don't deserve you.

 **jj** : Your comments give me life. You are hilarious.  
 **bluedragongirlhv** : Just wanted to clarify, Kagome will not be the one to kick Ayame's ass, per se. Though she could use an ass kicking right now, right? You'll just have to see.

When Kouga woke next, it was dawn and Kagome was absent from his arms.

Already standing, he sniffed the air and smelled her scent nearby. She was calm and happy, there was no fear in the air. Still, he had to find her. He should have warned her not to leave the den without him by her side. How else would he protect her? From other demon, his men and from the likes of Ayame?

He snarled, his clawed fingers clenching and unclenching at his side. He was off at a run to trail her scent, remembering her in his arms just a few short hours ago, content and warm.

 _Kagome._

If Ayame so much as breathed in Kagome's direction, he would put her six feet under.

He continued the short trial down the path he picked up her scent on, and stopped abruptly, his feet skidding to a halt in the dirt. Kagome was a modest girl and probably wouldn't take too kindly to him just showing up while she bathed, if she was bathing.

Halted, Kouga stood at a crossroads. Would it really be so bad if he just checked on her? He wouldn't be peeking, he was just protecting her. His feet carried him onward, just past a large rock before he stopped again.

Just beyond the large rock, a hundred yards away Kagome stood outside the spring, clearly having just bathed. She was dressed in a pair of khaki shorts with a belt and some sort of cotton black shirt with buttons down the middle. She had finished fixing the last button when he spotted her and was now in the process of wringing out her hair, sunning in her albeit strange human clothes.

Kouga was content with simply watching her in one of her most relaxed states. He watched in his trance like state as she stood, her bow raised, and released a bow several yards away.

His throat closed, eyes alert, sniffing for danger but there was none.

 _Then what was she…_

 _She is hunting._

Kagome retrieved her prize, a rabbit held by the scruff. Kouga heard the arrow and she pulled it clean from the animal's body, and then her cringe in doing so.

"Sorry, little guy, but a girl's gotta eat," he heard her say.

Kouga smirked, leaning against the rock, his arms folded over his chest. His woman was hunting. Kouga could not have been more proud. Of course she could take care of herself.

He chose that time to reveal himself and walked down the path to where she sat by the banks of the spring. She didn't spot him right away and he saw the pile of kill behind her. She must have spent the morning hunting down what had to be ten or twelve rabbits and four or so birds.

 _She's a killer, my Kagome_.

Just then Kagome was thinking how she would get her kill back to the den when the solution presented itself in wolf demon form.

Words would not form in her mind as she stared back at the figure before her, her eyes trailing down Kouga's body and then back to his sharp blue eyes.

She had not forgot the night before, spent in his arms, keeping the cold at bay, how she had asked him to stay. She turned clad in bare feet, to rinse her arrow in the water.

"Hey Kouga," she managed, her voice quiet.

He took a few steps in her direction.

 _Cat._

 _Mouse._

 _More like wolf and kitten._

"Been having fun?" he asked, grinning at her kill pile and then back at her, his eyes flashing.

Kagome snorted, biting her bottom lip.

 _Fun._

Gods, she would be the death of him if she didn't stop that.

"Something like that," she said, feeling more confident, her voice louder. The water washed away the remnants of blood and animal from her arrow.

"Planning on eating that by yourself, Kitten?"

 _Did he just call me Kitten?_

 _He definitely just called me Kitten._

Blushing, Kagome kept her back to him just a bit longer, allowing the blush to leave her face. "It was meant to be a gift for the pack. You know, for letting me stay," she said, rising from her heels and returning her clean arrow to its quiver on her back.

Kouga stood, staring at his precious woman. She had spent a good part of her morning hunting for his pack. She was strong and brave and loyal, just because she wanted to be and it floored him. He sat on the ground before her, cross legged, unable to hide the smile on his face.

Kagome couldn't help smiling back. "What has you in such a good mood, huh?"

Kouga had a vision of twirling her in his arms. He realized how silly that seemed, but didn't care.

 _You._

She sat in front of him, enjoying the cool morning and took the time to quickly braid her hair. The way Kouga said he liked.

Kagome shook that thought away like a cobweb.

It's the way she had done her hair for ages. Kouga just happened to like it.

There was no complaining though. Kagome had a successful morning hunt, a bath, and now she was resting in the presence of her wolf demon.

"Hey, do you want to help me lug this back to the den?"

Happy to comply, Kouga rose to his feet and picked up the animals that Kagome couldn't carry. Kagome sighed. "You know, I might need another bath after all this. I'm going to reek of dead rabbit. Yuck!"

Kouga's tail twitched. "I think you smell nice, Kagome."

Slightly less grossed out about herself, Kagome hoisted her bow higher up on her shoulders.

"You know something?" Kagome said thoughtfully.

"Hnn."

"I found you after wandering from my village for 16 days. Who knows where Miroku and Sango might be." Kagome sighed, feeling the heavy burden of her failure. "Am I foolish to hope I might find them, Kouga?"

"You're foolish to think you're foolish," Kouga replied, stopping to push her bangs out of her eyes. "If anyone will find your friends, my bet is on you, Kagome, and I'll do anything I can to help you."

Kagome's smile returned. Kouga always knew what to say.

By the time Kouga and Kagome had arrived back to the den, Kagome was giggling and Kouga was laughing at a story she just finished telling, his hand pressed to his chest. The atmosphere was light and Kouga couldn't have been happier.

Most of his men had risen with the sun coming up and were either tucking in to breakfast or out on a run for supplies.

Ginta approached them with wide eyes, stretching his arms over his chest. His eyes darted down to the pile of rabbits resting at their feet. "Whoa, Kouga! Somebody had a good morning."

Kouga shifted his weight on the other foot, arms crossed over his chest, beaming. "These are Kagome's. Her thanks for staying here."

Ginta's eyes glowed with appreciation. "Wow, thanks, Kagome! Geez, you're welcome to stay here as long as you like, you know that!"

Kagome blushed. "It's just a few rabbits. It's nothing, really."

"Either way, sentiment appreciated," Kouga said, his voice low. He reached a hand to hold her waist and pressed his lips to her forehead in a kiss.

Kagome didn't have time to process this as Ayame appeared out of nowhere. "Who knew the runt could hunt? Ha! I'm poetic! Look at that." Ayame laughed at her own joke.

Kagome seethed, attempting to control the flare in her temper.

"Good morning, Ayame," she bit out.

Kouga moved forward to attack, but Kagome wrapped her cool hands around his bicep with a small, "Don't." Her eyes said, _let me handle this._

His growl that permeated the room was in warning to the red headed demoness.

"Are you not fond of rabbit, Ayame?" Kagome asked, keeping her voice cool.

"Rabbit is for dogs. I guess you wouldn't know what wolves eat, hanging around that shit mutt for so long."

Kagome looked up at the ceiling in annoyance, touching her tongue to the roof of her mouth, praying for help not to pin an arrow through the she-wolf's skull.

"I've hunted much larger animals and demon before, and I had something else in mind, but I figured wolves don't eat their own kind," Kagome said, her voice dripping with fake sweetness, the meaning of her words ringing clear. "Oh, look at that, I rhymed."

Ginta choked on his own spit and Kouga slapped him on the back, doing nothing to hide the smirk on his face.

Kouga sneered at the unpleasant women. "Scram, Ayame!"

Ayame brushed her hair over her shoulder, fists clenched at her side. "Watch your back, little human."

That was all it took.

Kagome's scream of _No!_ had been lost amongst the commotion.

Kouga's growl carried through the entire den, a terrifying noise. His fangs bared, eyes a deep red, his claws stretched out as he charged at Ayame. He wrapped a single clawed hand around her throat before tossing her against the nearest cave wall. She crashed into the rocky den wall, her head smacking with a sickening crack. She slid down to wall on her back to her feet.

Kouga leapt after her, picking her up by her throat again. He clenched his fist hard enough to cause her pain but without stopping her from breathing.

His growl radiated through the den, soon drawing an audience. Kouga saw nothing but the disobedient demoness before him, the white of his eyes now a deep red. Ayame thrashed in his grip, scratching his hand and arms within her reach.

" **YOU WILL SUBMIT TO YOUR ALPHA!** " Kouga growled menacingly. As the red head continued to thrash, he crushed her head into the gravel of the wall behind her. " **SUBMIT!** "

Kagome found as frightening as Kouga was in this state, she couldn't look away. _Kouga_.

Alpha command was law and there was no defying it. Ayame stopped thrashing, submitting to Kouga's iron grip and the red of his eyes slowly returned to normal. Ayame panted with the effort of standing on her tip toes.

"Hear me, Ayame. If you so much as breathe on Kagome, _I will take you out_." The meaning was understood. "You threaten Kagome, you threaten me and it won't be stood for. Do I make myself clear?"

Ayame sucked in air, looking at Kouga with hate in her eyes. She nodded. "Abundantly."

Kouga threw her to the ground where she nursed a hand to her neck. "You're pathetic, Ayame."

The wolf prince turned his head to address the audience that had formed around them in the morning lit den. "Shows over! Get back to work, you mangy mutts!" He turned back to where Kagome had stood to find her gone.

He smelled her scent close by, but it was tainted with anxiety. Kouga found her just a short walk from the den, as she paced back and forth, rubbing the heel of her hand against her temple. He took her other arm, his grip light, pulling her against him. He held his breath until she sighed, leaning into him.

 _Yes, let me comfort you._

He sighed, feeling comfort, too. It didn't make any sense. She wasn't his mate, not yet. She shouldn't have this effect on him.

 _Kagome._

He noted the lavender scent of her hair as he rested his cheek on the top of her head and made a note to ask her about it later.

Kagome took a deep breath and put some distance between them. "I'm okay," and when Kouga didn't speak, she insisted, "Really. It's just…" She wrapped her arms around herself, thinking.

Kouga listened, waiting for her to continue.

"Sometimes I forget about the part of you that is a demon," she finished, laughing nervously at how dumb that sounded. Just then his tail swished back and forth.

It was true. She forgot sometimes Kouga's strength, or perhaps even that Ayame could snap her neck with a flick of her wrist. She forgot that they were big bad wolf demons and that they should scare her. Kagome wasn't afraid, but… She couldn't quite put a word to her feelings.

Kouga softened further. "You know that I had to do that, right?" he asked, needing her reassurance. "Ayame was out of line." He stepped into her again, a hand holding her face, another gripping her waist.

"I can't let her hurt you. I _won't_ ," he promised fiercely, looking her straight in the eyes. His other left her waist to hold her face in both hands. "I will _always_ protect you."

Kagome couldn't breathe. Every time he touched her, every time he got close her stomach felt like it was flipped upside down. His vow to keep her safe was ringing in her ears and his eyes captivating her attention.

"I don't want to cause a rift between you and your pack," Kagome said, gazing back, her voice barely a whisper.

Kouga hesitated before saying, "But you're Pack."

"On whose word? I'm not mated to you," Kagome said sadly. _Almost bitterly_ , Kouga noted. "And I'm human, a former priestess at that. How can your pack accept me?"

"Because I do." Kouga's thumb brushed over her cheek.

"And you – you're Alpha, so they have to, right?"

"Ayame is…" he chose his words carefully, "exceptional. Everyone else welcomes you."

"But they have to! Even if they don't want to. Even if deep down they despise me. I don't want that."

 _She's crazy if she doesn't see how valuable she is to my pack._

"What do you want, Kagome?" Kouga asked, running his fingers against her hair and placing delicate touches against her face.

Closing her eyes, Kagome thought about it.

 _What do I want?_

 _I want Inuyasha to be alive and happy._

 _I want my family to be safe and not to worry about me here._

 _I want Ayame not to hate me._

 _I want…_

Kagome bit down on her bottom lip as the next item on the list passed in her thoughts.

 _Kouga._

 _I want Kouga, but I don't know what that means._

 _More than anything I want to understand these strange feelings I have whenever he's close. I want to know what this pull is._

 _I want him to kiss me._

"I want..." The warm breeze carried between them and she caught her own scent in the air.

Oh gods, she knew exactly what she wanted. She still smelled of dead rabbit.

Her eyes popped open.

"Can we go for a swim?"

Kouga smirked. "'Course we can."


	9. Chapter 8: Want

" _My body is a dead language and you pronounce each word perfectly."_ – Sierra Demulder

When Kagome had asked to go for a swim, Kouga was more than happy to grant her wish. A few of the other wolves joined them, in need of a little fun. The wolves shed their armor and extra fur, but kept the furs wrapped around their hips for Kagome's sake. Normally they wouldn't think anything of their nudity, but Kagome had expressed her wish for them to remain _somewhat decent for Pete's sake_ , whatever that meant.

Kagome had removed her belt and her long sleeve shirt, donning a thin black sports bra and a pair of black nylon shorts. She even took her hair out of its pleat and threw it over her shoulders to cover herself more. She shrugged. This was about as good as it was going to get. There was zero chance she would wear her bathing suit in front of Kouga and a bunch of wolves. Especially when the wolf prince seemed to have a difficulty keeping his paws off her as it was.

 _Nope. Definitely not Kouga._

To Kouga, she looked like perfection. The curvature of her figure, honing in on her cub bearing hips. Kouga watched her from a distance, hidden beneath the shade of some overhanging trees. He regarded her as she entered the water, relaxing into the cool waters of the spring. He watched as her head lulled back and she shook her fingers through her hair.

Kagome was still reeling from the intense morning activities and the emotional epiphany she had about her wolf demon.

 _I want Kouga_.

 _But how do I want him?_

 _Do I need him to be my friend or…_

 _More_ sounded too frightening, too big, so Kagome settled for _different._

 _Do I want him to be different than friends? Do I want us to be different?_

Kagome stepped deeper into the cold spring, allowing the water to sway over her hips, giving way as she submerged deeper in the water. She palmed some of the water, splashing it over her shoulders and massaging what appeared to be a tender area. Kouga could not have been more hypnotized. His women in the spring with him, partially undressed.

His inner wolf was going insane and Kagome might as well have lassoed him around the neck and been pulling him towards her. She hadn't seen him yet, her back turned from him, and he slowly stalked after her, predator seeking prey.

 _Wolf and kitten_.

Kagome had just dunked herself beneath the surface, rinsing herself of the dead animal scent. She resurfaced, water dripping down her form. She didn't care how cold the water was and after the showdown with Ayame, Kagome wouldn't have complained even if it was icier than she was used to.

 _Ayame…_

The redhead was a whole 'nother headache Kagome just didn't feel like focusing on right now. She twisted her hair, ringing out the extra moisture from her hair. She had her friends to think about, how to find them, and much warmer, hotter, wolfier things on her mind.

 _Ask and he'll appear…_

Kagome lifted her lids to see her wolf approaching, still some ten feet away, his gaze lingering anywhere but her eyes, clearly unaware that he was staring. Kagome smirked. It certainly was nice to be appreciated.

A feminine giggle snapped Kouga out of his trance and his eyes connected with hers. His stare, his eyes, those bright, crystal blue eyes quieted her laughter immediately. Nobody had ever looked at her like that. Like she was more precious than gold and Kouga didn't wish to waste of his life not gazing upon her. It completely disarmed her, freezing her in place.

 _How does he always do that?_

"Hey," she said quietly, unsure what to do now.

"Hey," he replied, his voice deep. It reminded her of the night before, practically hours ago, Kouga's voice rough with sleep. Kagome closed her eyes to the vision, her lip between her teeth.

 _I've been here less than 24 hours and I feel like I've got myself in such an emotional mess._

"You've got to stop doing that," he said silkily. Kagome felt Kouga's thumb brush over her bottom lip, coaxing it from between her teeth. "It drives me crazy."

She felt his breath fan across her face.

Kagome breathed out, afraid to open her eyes, afraid of what she would see in Kouga's.

"Turn."

"Huh?" Kagome opened her eyes at his sudden command.

He grinned wolfishly at her, twirling his pointer finger, motioning for her to turn around. "I saw you rubbing your shoulder."

Understanding dawned on her and a cold shiver bloomed up her spine. She breathed out a laugh, waving him off. "Oh, you don't have to. It's noth –"

He took her by her shoulders and spun her around and quicker than she could blink, his hands were massaging her poor sore muscles, his hands applying the perfect pressure.

"There?" he asked.

"Down just a little, but essentially, yes," Kagome answered, her voice light and airy.

Kagome thought about what it might be like to die and she hoped this is what it felt like. Oh how she wanted to lean back against him, rest her head against his chest. Kagome fought it, searching her brain for conversation, a distraction, anything but his hands on her, all over her.

"How are you so tense? Is it my bed?" Kouga asked, sounding genuinely concerned for her sleep.

She shook her head. "N-no. I've just been out of practice with my bow and feeling it."

Kagome inhaled sharply when he pressed through a particularly tough muscle. He paused.

"D-don't, it – it feels good, I just – " Kagome trailed off as his fingers kept working through her muscles, his hands spreading fire through her entire body. That's what being next to Kouga felt like. It felt like being on fire.

Kouga smirked behind her. "You talk in your sleep, did you know?"

Kagome gasped at the realization. _Oh no! What did I say?_

She gently shook her head. "N-no." She hardly even noticed the goosebumps covering her skin. "W-what did I say?"

"Well," he said, working down her back. "You said that I was warm."

Kagome nearly turned, but he held her in place. "You are! I could fry an egg on you!"

He leaned into her, his lips grazing her ear. "I expressed how cold you were and do you know what you said?" His fingers pulled her hair over one shoulder, away from her throat.

Kagome couldn't do anything but shiver and shake her head.

"You – told me – to do – something about it," Kouga said, placing warm kisses along the juncture of her throat. He was rewarded with a full body shiver and a delicious sigh from between her lips.

His heat was everywhere, his face next to her throat, breathing in her scent. Her heart raced but he did not smell fear or worry on her, so he didn't move. Yet.

Kagome shuddered in his arms, turning her head to the side, subconsciously revealing more of her throat to him.

"Did I?" Kagome asked. She had lost it. She'd really lost it. "That was stupid."

 _Never challenge of wolf demon. Especially one with the hots for you. Never ever, ever._

Kouga chuckled, his laughter tickling her throat. His hands moved from her back, one appreciating the flat plains of her stomach, the other both caressing up and down her arm, over the curve of her waist and hips.

It was certainly nice to be appreciated.

"Koug– " His name died on her lips in a soft moan, as he pressed another warm kiss against the sensitive skin of her throat.

Everything in his wolf screamed for him to _Take_. How he wanted to oblige his instincts. Especially with the new scent of her arousal in the air. He liked that he was able to make her feel like this, that she relaxed so easily in his arms and that he could make her want him.

Kagome didn't fight it and found she didn't want to. Except for one thing.

"The others," she panted.

 _I want them to see what's mine_. Kouga's arm tightened around her waist, holding her to him, growling possessively.

"They're playing and not paying any attention to us," he purred in her ear, his fingers running circles over her belly.

Here Kouga was lavishing affection on her, kissing her. Not on the lips, but he was kissing her! Still, she figured now was as good a time as any to fess up, especially if he didn't plan on stopping _that_.

Kagome sighed. "You – earlier you asked me what I wanted and I – " she said between kisses, fighting hard to keep the noises down. "I know now. What I want."

Kouga had a feeling he knew the answer. "What's that?"

Slowly, she turned in his arms and he let her.

"Kouga, kiss me."

He didn't need to be asked twice and Kagome couldn't wait any longer. While she had thought about it since the evening before when he got her all hot and bothered, almost kissing her, Kouga had wanted to kiss her for eight years. Now, they were both about to get what they wanted.

Kouga was centimeters from claiming her sweet lips when a giant splash erupted around them. They sprang apart to see Ginta and Hakkaku wrestling in the water, having clearly just tossled from a great height.

Kouga growled at the disruption. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU TOO IDIOTS!"

Ginta passed his hand through his wet hair, laughing nervously. "Sorry boss. We were just playing."

Kagome couldn't help but laugh.

 **Author Note** : Don't kill me. I love you.


	10. Chapter 9: The Well

Author Note: This chapter is short, but I promise good things. You all have been so good to me.

 _If you want me to break down and give you the keys.  
I can do that but I can't let you leave._

 _Oh please don't go.  
I want you so  
I can't let go.  
For I lose control.  
_– Barcelona "Please Don't Go"

Twenty days. Kagome had been in the Feudal Era world for just over 20 days. She knew that she would need to return soon, if nothing but to reassure her family she was still alive. The question would be how to convince her wolf demon to take her back to the Bone Eater's Well. She hadn't given up on her quest to locate the relocated monk, demon slayer and kitsune. The only problem was finding them, or any trace of them.

Things around the den were mostly quiet for the next few days and Kagome avoided physical contact with Kouga as much as possible after their second almost kiss. That was too close for comfort and Kouga's physical advances were much too quick a pace. Not to say that avoiding physical contact was easy. Whatever physical tether that pulled her to him yanked around her heart and squeezed every time he passed and like there was a rope around her middle pulling her towards him.

They couldn't be intimate yet. No matter the stupid rope pulling feeling or their attraction to one another or emotional breakthrough she had. Before they tried any of that again, she needed to explain _going back to her village_.

Other than that, Ayame stayed mostly out of the way. Kagome felt bad about the way Kouga had man handled her, but she figured wolf demon bodies were much more resilient than humans.

The weather today was a bit warmer, the sun bright in the sky. Kagome had hardly noticed she was even walking before Kouga stood right in front of her. He had just barked orders at a set of his pack who ran off to accomplish whatever task the wolf prince had requested.

His long hair down beckoned to her hands, but she held them to her sides, no matter how compelling, determined not to be controlled by this idiotic physical tether.

 _He really is gorgeous._

The heart clenching feeling returned with a vengeance, almost making her double over in agony at the thought, her heart thrumming in her chest.

 _And gods I'm weak for him_.

"Kagome," he said with relief and a little bit of exhaustion, wrapping his arms around her shoulders, crushing her to him. He smelled like pine and mandarin, and despite the anguish of her heart, she smiled against him. She wondered if he had the heart crushing feeling whenever she was around, too. She imagined he did with the way he always breathed her in like he had been holding his breath.

"Kouga, can we go for a walk?" she asked, pushing her hands against him. "I need to discuss something with you."

He nodded, scenting her unease. They began walking and moved in silence through the trees. "You've been avoiding me," he said matter of factly.

 _Well, he sure doesn't beat around the bush._

Kagome sighed, wordless. This wasn't how she planned this conversation to go. She blinked, determined.

"Kouga, do you understand how the Bone Eater's Well works? The well that returns me to my village?" she asked.

The wolf prince shook his head.

"It returns me to my village, my time through like…. a portal."

"You're asking me to bring you back." It wasn't a question and reality dawned on him. "You said it doesn't always work. You said it took you 3 years to come back. And then another five!"

He was angry and Kagome sighed. This was about how she expected this conversation to go. She sighed.

"What if it doesn't let you return, Kagome?" he asked, growling, stopping her with a hand around her arm. "I can't…" You never admit weakness in front of your mate. Never. "I can't lose you again. I won't."

Kagome was astounded by his affectionate words. "Kouga…"

"I can't. I won't take you back there, Kagome," Kouga said roughly, resolute. "What if you don't come back? If you didn't come back, do you understand what that would do to me this time?"

 _This time?_

Kagome's eyes brimmed with tears. "Kouga, I – "

"If you didn't come back, I would lose my mind. I would die from the heart ache!"

Kouga turned from her and punched a tree and it snapped in half, giving with little force. He turned back to her, his eyes heavy with sadness. "Your scent is everywhere! It's in the spring, in my bed, in the trees, on me. I can't wash you off and believe me I have tried."

Kagome's tears fell quietly down her cheeks. "Kouga, I have to try and go back. My family, they – they know I'm here but I've been gone for almost 3 weeks. My mother will start to worry."

Despite her reasons for going back home, she sympathized with her wolf demon. His fears weren't entirely unreasonable. She knew there was a possibility of the well closing up, perhaps forever.

"I have to let my family know I'm alright, okay? It won't be for long, I just have to – have to let them know. I'll come back as fast as I can, okay?" Kagome would have promised anything if it made Kouga see reason. "The well will work. I'll come back. I won't leave you again."

 _No._

 _No, you can't leave._

 _No, I need you._

 _No, I love you._

These are all things Kouga wanted to say, but didn't. His anger ebbed and he sighed.

 _I won't leave you again._

Her last statement calmed him immensely. He trusted his woman, he had to. He wouldn't think about her not returning. She had to.

Kouga enveloped her in his arms again in a telling embrace. "If I… If I bring you back to the well and you don't return," he said, pulling away, his hands cradling her face, his eyes bright and alive. "I will spend my entire existence tearing through the universe looking for you. I will never stop running and I will never stop looking for you. Do you understand?"

His sincere words only made her cry more and he remembered their conversation about humans who cried when they were happy. He couldn't tell if this was one of those times.

Kagome felt like the wind was knocked out of her. The heart clenching feeling wouldn't let up. No, she was positive. It was worse.

 _Why do I feel like this? This hurts!_

Kouga sighed, his hand sliding down her arm and took her hand in his. Kagome realized she had said it out loud.

"It feels like my heart is being crushed and I feel like I don't even move of my own accord anymore."

She lifted her lashes up at him. "D-do you - is this what it feels like for you, Kouga?"

For the first time, he wouldn't grace her with eye contact. She leaned in towards him.

 _I knew it!_

The tether like feeling she had, the urges to be near him, to have him close, to be intimate with him were real, and it was real for him, too.

Kagome wiped her tears off her face and sniffled. "Kouga, years ago you told me that wolves m-mate for life. That once they do, it's almost impossible to be separate from one another."

He shifted uncomfortably, his fingers brushing against the pulse of her wrist. It felt like a hummingbird.

 _She remembered me telling her that?_

Kagome carried on. "You asked me if I knew what going home would do to you, and I know we aren't mated, but Kouga, what will happen to you if I go through the well and can't come back?"

Kouga found he was unable to let go of her hand. "You said that wouldn't happen."

Kagome shook her head. "No, I'm gonna come right back. You'll see," she promised, knowing she might not keep that promise.

It was afternoon when Kouga made it to the well. He insisted on holding Kagome bridal style as he ran and she didn't argue. He ran fast, faster than he thought he could move. The faster they ripped this band aid off, the faster that perhaps it might be over and she would be back in his arms. Or maybe Kagome would get stuck in the well and wouldn't be able to return to him.

His pace slowed at the thought, just a little as he relished the feeling of having her in his arms for possibly the last time.

Kouga stared at the Bone Eater's Well for about ten minutes, Kagome still in his arms, as if willing it to explode.

Her gentle voice brought him back and he placed her gently on the ground. Kagome had never been so disappointed to see the old well.

"I'm going to go and I need to… I need to talk to my mom and check on my grandpa and brother, but you'll see, I'll be back before it gets dark here. I promise to come back, I -"

His lips connected to hers, his body slamming against hers, shoving her against the body nearest tree. He kissed her as if he would never see her again, as if he was always meant to. She sensed his need and desperation in the air, in the way he kissed her, the way his hands caressed her neck, the way his hips pressed against hers, and the pained expression as he pulled away.

His voice was hoarse when he spoke, "You should go."

Kagome looked at him and tried to siphon strength from his azure eyes. More than ever, she wanted to be selfish and stay, but she had to do one last thing before she came back.

"Kagome, if you come back I won't… I won't let you return to your village," he said, his voice dark, his lids hooded. A growl of finality rumbled from his chest.

Kagome nodded. "Just a few hours," she whispered. She reached up to touch his face, to give him reassurance, but he backed away from her. His eyes were cast beneath his lids and his fangs were bared.

She retracted her hand to her side and nodded, willing herself not to feel hurt. "Did we… by kissing, di we make it – _this_ – worse?"

"No!" he barked and then softer, "No. It could never be worse. Just… more difficult."

Kagome pretended to understand.

"Just go," Kouga ordered gruffly.

 _If she touches me again, it will be impossible for me to let her leave. And she will hate me for that._

"Come back quickly, Kagome," he added, his voice low.

She looked at him one last time, nodding with a smile. "Be back before you can blink." She threw her legs over the lip of the well and disappeared.


	11. Chapter 10: Fire

Author Note: *blushes and runs away*

" _You're making me crazy, really driving me mad. That's all right with me, it's really no fuss. As long as you're next to me, just the two of us." –Mac DeMarco "My Kind of Women"_

As Kagome disappeared from his sight, Kouga rushed forward, leaning over the lip of the well. There was a bright flash of light and then nothing but an empty well and the beating of his heart.

He stared at the hole of the well, cursing it every minute that passed by without his Kagome's return. He thought about her not coming back and he thought about torching the well.

 _Back before dark._

 _Back by sundown._

 _Hours, not days._

 _Not years._

 _Not forever._

Kouga stared at the bottom of the well, waiting for the human girl to return.

Once back in the well house, Kagome climbed out of the well, her backpack in tow. She had left her bow and arrow and pretty much everything else in the den since she had every intention of returning as quickly as possible.

Kagome climbed out of the well and stood in the musty room. The last time she had been here she was questioning her purpose in life. She had once vowed never to visit the Feudal Era again, and now she could not wait to race back to it. If the well worked... She thought about going back now, but Kouga would probably flip a gasket if she said she was only testing it.

Hours. She looked at her watch on her wrist. She had hours before the sun set.

She pushed through the well house doors and into the bright light of the day. She could smell something her mother was cooking. Kagome hadn't realized how much she had missed her mother until now.

She ran, up the steps, bursting into the front door that was always unlocked, wrapping her arms around her mother who stood at the stove stirring stew.

"Oh Kagome!" she chirped excitedly. "You're back. Welcome home!"

Kagome sniffed deeply when she realized she was in tears. "Mama! I have so much to tell you!"

"Well, I'm making dinner. Would you perhaps like a bath first?"

Kagome shook her head. There was no time for baths.

"I don't have a lot of time," Kagome said quickly. "I have to go back."

Her mother's eyes were so understanding. "Oh? So soon? Will you stay for supper?"

Kagome nodded, frazzled, her brain moving at a million miles a minute. "I think so. I have to return before the sun sets, I… Mom, I don't even know what to tell you first."

She thought back of all that had transpired just within the last few hours. Kouga had kissed her, really kissed her and said he couldn't lose her again.

 _I can't lose you again. I won't._

A vision of Kouga ripping through the body of a tree as he had said with anguish, _If you didn't come back, I would lose my mind. I would die from the heart ache!_

Kagome blinked back tears as she thought about everything he had said. _Your scent is everywhere! It's in the spring, in my bed, in the trees, on me. I can't wash you off and believe me I have tried._

 _No. He won't have to wash me off,_ she thought. _I'll talk to mama and then I'll be back Kouga!_

Kagome's mother, turned down the stew on the stove and sat down in front of her daughter. "I'm all ears, baby."

Kouga sat in front of the tree opposing the well, glaring at it, willing time to move faster. He looked up. The sun had not made much process in the sky.

 _Dammit!_

He returned his gaze back to the well.

 _Stupid well._

 _Swallowing up my Kagome._

 _Taking her away._

Kouga's hands ran through his long ebony hair as he thought about how he had finally laid claim to her lips. He thought about how difficult it had been to let her go, how strong the urge to mate her had become and how it would only grow worse the longer they delayed it.

 _But if you don't come back_ ….

Kouga was certain of one thing. He loved Kagome. Humans who only lived a short while seemed to do everything much more slowly, including falling in love, while wolf demons lived for thousands of years, yet they sensed the one they belonged with and then mated for life. Until death and then sometimes after.

He wasn't sure how mating would go with a human woman, but he would love Kagome until her body rotted away.

If only she came back.

Even if she didn't.

His clawed fingers dug into the earth and he willed his mind to drift anywhere else but there.

"And you love this man?"

Kagome looked up at her mother, face tinted pink. "I didn't say that, I –"

Her mother winked. "Your mama may be old, but she's no spring chicken, Kagome. I know love when I see it. It's written all over your face."

The young woman stood, jarring the table they were at as she did. Kagome never planned to love Kouga, she never planned to love anyone again after Inuyasha. Her mother was right. It didn't make any sense, the entire mating thing, the draw she had to the man she had reunited with less than a week ago. Humans just didn't fall in love in a week. Yet… she couldn't explain the longing to be with Kouga, to be beside him, to love him.

 _But Mama is right. I do love Kouga. Maybe not in love with him, but I must care enough about him to risk never seeing my family again. Not seeing my friends. Or Souta. Or grandpa._

She sighed. _Why do I ever question it? Mama is always right._

"I might not come back this time. I might not be able to," Kagome blurted out. "From the Feudal Era." This was the part of the conversation she had dreaded.

Kagome's mother smiled brightly. "I understand, Kagome."

Just like that.

 _Mama…_

Kagome looked up, feeling anxious as she stared at the clock on the wall. It said **5:17**. She had maybe an hour before the sun would be setting.

"Where are grandpa and Souta?"

"Souta is out with his friends and grandpa is at the doctors for a cough. It's nothing to worry about."

"But mama, I –"

"They'll _understand_ , Kagome."

Her eyes brimmed with tears, nodding. She knew Grandpa would, but Souta… She hoped he wouldn't resent her.

"I have to –"

Kagome needed to gather some things before she left.

"I know, Kagome. It's alright." Her mother shoo'ed her out of the kitchen.

Kagome ran upstairs to her room.

The sun had set and Kouga was growing more and more agitated with the well before him. He walked up to it, his fists clenching against the lip of the well, cracking and splintering the wood.

A growl erupted from his chest and he leaned over the well, hoping for a glimmer of anything before angrily shoving away from it.

It was dark. Kagome was late. And dread had set in.

He paced away from the well. Standing right beside it only made him more distressed. Right now he had a mind to yank the trees out by their roots.

She was just a little late. It was probably nothing. She was probably saying goodbye to her mother.

"Stupid shit well, give her back!" he growled, punching his fist through another tree. The tree crumbled and collapsed on the ground, and he was so preoccupied he didn't see the flash of the well he hated so much, signaling someone's return.

 _I'm back! I'm really back! Kouga!_

Kagome hurriedly climbed out of the well, throwing her backpack over the side. She had decided against her better judgement to take a quick shower and she realized as she threw herself over the lip of the well that it was already dark.

 _Shit!_

Suddenly Kagome nearly fell back into the well at the sound of something heavy falling to the ground, rattling the ground around her. Wildly, she looked around in search of her wolf demon but he was nowhere to be found. She picked up her bag and slung it over her back.

 _Trees._

Another tree clattered to the ground and a growl tore through the atmosphere.

 _What the hell is going on?_

 _Where is Kouga?_

She was too terrified to cry out in fear of whoever was tossing forestry around.

Kouga was about to pick up another tree, when he caught her scent in the air. It was new and faint and she was frightened, but she was back.

Yet, he needed to be sure that he wasn't simply losing his mind. That was a possibility.

"Kagome?" he shouted from the mess of trees.

 _He's… he waited for me. He waited here for me to come back?_

She thought that he would be in the area, not waiting for her to come back.

"Kouga," she said quietly, hardly able to control her spastic heart, taking a step in the direction she had heard his voice. Was he shoving over trees in her absence?

Several things happened at once.

Kagome dropped her bag on the ground.

The air whooshed from her lungs.

With speed she couldn't see, strong tan limbs appeared around her. Kouga had buried his face in her hair, taking in large gulps of her scent as he held her, saying her name over and over again like a mantra.

He held her in his arms, quelling the beat of his frantic heart that had dreaded the possibility of not seeing her again, breathing in her scent that called to him like a siren.

He inhaled.

 _No. She's here. She's definitely here._

Neither of them said anything for a few minutes. She had done something to her scent. She no longer carried his scent and so in the silence, he worked his hands through her hair, touching her neck, her arms, her back, her lips and face.

Finally, then, his heart beat slowed.

 _Stupid heart_.

Kouga sighed, cradling her face and placing his forehead against hers.

"I was going crazier every second after you left," he confessed, his voice hoarse. Truthfully he was exhausted.

"I could see that," Kagome giggled. "Tossing trees in my absence?"

 _I'm going to be tossing you around soon,_ he thought.

He gazed into her eyes and she melted. He grinned knowingly. "My wolf was going bat shit, Kagome."

Kagome held a lock of his hair, her hands resting plainly on his chest. "Were you in any pain?"

He shook his head. "I'm fine now that you're here."

"I got to talk to my mom before I left," she said quietly, trying to keep the emotion from her voice.

"Oh yeah?"

She nodded slowly. "She said if I'm not to return that you have to…" It was getting harder to see through the tears blurring her vision. "Mama said you have to protect me, take care of me, and make sure I'm happy. She said that –" She paused, biting down on her lips hard, almost breaking the skin.

Kouga touched his thumb to her mouth and gently said, "Stop that." And then, "What else did Mama say?"

Kagome took a deep breath. "She said that to risk never being able to see her again... that I must really love you."

Kouga regarded her, strumming his fingers through her loose hair. "What did you say?"

Kagome smiled, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. "I told her she was crazy." She paused, "And I don't really know how I feel. I know I feel something, but Kouga, humans don't really just fall in love that quickly. It usually takes… time. I don't feel like I understand anything."

Then Kagome asked what she had wanted to ask since he had kissed her, the elephant in the room. "Am I supposed to be your mate, Kouga? Is that where all these feelings are coming from?"

"I tried to tell you when you were fifteen that you were my mate and that I was in love with you, and you," he paused, "were in love with someone else.

"That doesn't usually happen when a wolf meets their mate. You're just feeling these things now, but my feelings haven't ever changed," he said.

Kagome pieced what he was saying together. "So since I was in love with someone else, I couldn't experience what you felt? I couldn't experience the whole Mate bonding or whatever?"

Kouga shrugged. "Not everything is super black and white when it comes to Mating, especially loving a human."

"But I feel it now?" Kagome said, intending it to be a statement and not a question.

"But you feel it now."

At least Kouga was sure of it.

Kagome had so many questions she needed answering, but for now she was content to be back in his arms.

She looked up at him, suddenly feeling the weight of the day pass through her limbs and feeling very tired.

"Kouga, can you take us home?"

He picked her up, backpack and all, and he ran.

Kagome hadn't expected the welcoming roar of the den upon her return. The wolves and men howled, cheered and clapped as Kouga first entered and then it grew louder as she walked in just behind him.

That morning, Kagome remembered expressing that she didn't feel she belonged and wasn't welcomed. Oh how she had been wrong.

"Glad to have you back, Kagome!" a female called among the noise.

Kouga took her by the wrist and though he nodded to his men, they passed through quickly to his den, away from the noise and prying eyes. He had barked orders that they were not to be disturbed under any circumstances.

He would kill whoever had the audacity to disrupt them.

"What's your rush, Kouga?" Kagome laughed.

"This."

He reached up to hold her face in his hands and suddenly his lips were on hers. Their first kiss had been desperate and rushed before her return to her era. This was slow, building, and deliberate. His lips caressed hers, his hands roaming from her face, down her waist and over her hips, his hands leaving a trail of fire that licked and burned in her veins and made her brain mush.

Kagome would give up breathing if it meant the wolf prince kept kissing her. She sighed as she moved against him, her hands moving up his chest and throwing her arms around his neck. He growled appreciatively as he placed his hands over her bottom and pulled her against him. Kagome couldn't think of a word to describe what this felt like.

 _Fire._

This felt like fire.

"Kouga," she said heatedly, trying to pull away.

His arms didn't budge an inch and he grinned wolfishly at her. "Un-uh. I'm not done yet, Kitten." He moved them against the wall and his lips moved over her face and jaw and down her throat, swallowing the delectable breathy moan as he kissed her lips once more.

The urge to take her was stronger than ever before. He wanted to mark her, but he also didn't want to frighten her. Kagome didn't yet encompass the knowledge of what Mating meant.

His fang grazed the skin of her collarbone. His wolf howled.

 _Wait, boy._

"Do you trust me?" he asked huskily, placing more kisses over her neck, kissing her pulse point. Her arousal was thick in the air and he breathed deep.

"Un-Huh." Her answer was mostly a breathy moan. One of her hands palmed down his chest and he gasped inwardly. He wouldn't be able to resist her much longer if she didn't stop that.

"Are you particularly fond of these clothes?"

Kagome shook her head, unable to shake the burning, light headedness. She didn't so much as blink when Kouga took a clawed finger and ripped her shirt right down the middle, followed closely by her shorts.

His hands were on her again, pushing the offending garments off her body. His lips moved over her collarbone and the top of her shoulder. His fingers danced down the plains of her waist and lit her skin aflame, touching the now bare skin of her hips.

His nose brushed against the juncture of her shoulder and throat. "When I take you, I would mark you here," he said plainly, his eyes dark as he thought about doing just that.

Kagome swallowed, but did not stop her hands trailing over his chest. "Does it hurt?"

Kouga's growl hummed in his throat. "No." He grinned. "It's actually quite pleasurable for the both of us."

"But it would mean that –" she broke off and Kouga didn't interrupt, needing her to finish. "It would mean that I was yours. To the other men. They couldn't…"

Kouga nodded, his nose brushing over her throat. "Are you mine?" he asked, leaving kisses up and down the sensitive skin of her throat. He was toying with her. She didn't mind.

Kagome nodded.

"Y-yes."

Kouga was moving simply on animal instinct. His eyes grew dark. "Say it." He needed his woman to say it. "Tell me you're mine."

Kagome could hardly form thougths, let alone speak. "I am, I –"

Kouga brushed his fingers gingerly towards her inner thigh. "Be a good girl and I will give you what you want."

She nearly smirked. _How does he know what I –_ Kouga brushed his fore finger over the bundle of nerves between her thighs, groaning at how wet she felt.

 _I'm doing this to you. Now say it!_

"I'm yours," she whimpered, grinding against his hand.

 _Mine_.

He strummed his finger back in forth over the bundle of nerves, the thin under garment being the only thing separating them. Kagome was nearly embarrassed by how quickly she was finding her release.

"Do you still trust me?" he asked, his lids hooded as he stoked the flame between her legs.

"Yes, good gods, yes!" she cried out.

Kouga's eyes flashed red before he bit down into her skin.


	12. Chapter 11: Questions

Author Note: *cackles evilly*

 _You are the finest, loveliest, tenderest, and most beautiful person I have ever know – and even that is an understatement.  
_ –F. Scott Fitzgerald

Kagome twitched in the wolf prince's arms, still very asleep since their journey back from the well and apparently dreaming. Briefly he wondered what she was dreaming about.

Upon his return, he had signaled to the others in the den to keep the noise down with a finger to his lips. She was asleep and after the eventful day she had, he planned to do everything in his power to let her rest.

Kouga wasn't stupid. He knew what Kagome was giving up. Not seeing her home again or her family. He just didn't see any way around it. Mated couples struggled enough as it was being separated when the male left for runs or to ward off enemies. Kouga had lived long enough to witness mated spouse's quickly lose their minds with the loss of the other. They were yet to be mated, but it was only a matter of time.

Doing his best not to jostle the woman in his arms, Kouga tossed her bag in the corner, slid down the wall of his private den and released the breath he had been holding. The den was dark except for a torch hanging on the wall giving the room a little light.

"Kou-ga."

His neck nearly snapped at attention to the breathy moan that had escaped the rosy lips of his beloved, her body writhing beneath him and the scent of her faint arousal in the air.

Kouga bared a single fang, smirking into the shadows of his den. Oh, he knew exactly what she was dreaming about.

For a human, Kagome sure was exhibiting some of the exact behaviors of a woman about to be mated. He had half a mind to wake her up then. Mulling the decision over in his head, his desire to protect her and her rest won out. That didn't mean that he couldn't… _encourage_ her fantasies while she slept. She _was_ dreaming about him after all.

Using the lightest of touches, Kouga brushed his fingers across the side of her face. Just as he predicted, Kagome leaned her cheek into his warm hand. Then he ran his thumb over her bottom lip and she sighed. He had to remind himself that she was in fact asleep when she whimpered his name again, wriggling in his arms.

Yes, she was acting very much like a soon-to-be mate.

Lost in thought, he felt his woman's fingers against his cheek and looked down to find her eyes open.

 _Not asleep._

Definitely not asleep anymore.

"Kouga?"

The girl roused blearily, uncertain what had pulled her from sleep. She had been having very pleasant dreams about _him_ and was feeling a little heated. She sat up, but Kouga didn't unlock his arms around her. He wasn't ready to let go just yet.

"You fell asleep." His voice was hoarse.

"I'm here? I almost thought for a moment I had fallen asleep in my bed at home," Kagome said, he noted, a bit sadly.

"Are you unhappy with your decision, Kagome?" Kouga inhaled the heady scent of her arousal still lingering in the air. He strummed his fingers across her hip and he was rewarded with her biting down on her lip.

Kagome shook her head. "No. I… I want to be here with you." She sighed. "I'm just going to miss my brother and grandpa. I didn't get to see them before I left."

Standing in the dimly lit room, Kagome searched blindly for her things and tried to clear the fog in her head from the very real dream she had just had. She tripped, but sooner than she had faltered, Kouga's hands were around her waist righting her.

His growl hummed low in her ear. "Careful, you're previous cargo," he said huskily and Kagome was suddenly very aware of how close he was standing behind her. Her skin buzzed with the physical contact and the feel of warm, wet lips on her throat.

This was very reminiscent of the dream she just had.

"You mean your precious cargo?" she asked, a bit sarcastically. What had gotten into her to make her act so _flirtatious_?

Kouga growled low in agreement, his hands sliding from her waist down to her hips possessively and squeezing. He inhaled the breathy whimper that left her mouth.

"I like the sound of that." He squeezed her hips again, earning another gasp. It was adorable that she was putting so much effort into being quiet. "Mine."

"I had a feeling you would," Kagome replied, her voice sultry. _God, Kagome, shut up!_

Kouga pushed them against the flat of the cold den wall, his hands at either side of her head. He leaned in, his nose nuzzling her neck at her pulse point, which was thrumming erratically.

"Been dreaming about me?" he whispered knowingly.

Kagome gasped.

 _How could he… did I?_

 _Oh no, I definitely blabbed in my sleep again._

"Saying my name in your sleep was my first clue," he purred in her ear, answering her questions before they were asked.

Kagome blushed, thankful she wasn't facing him.

His clawed fingers brushed her hair over one shoulder as he continued his assault on her neck. Kagome couldn't help the moan that slipped between her lips, or the way her backside pressed against his front. He growled at the sensation the friction caused and the peak of her arousal in the air.

Roughly, he turned her over, her back smacking hard against the wall of the den. Without missing but a second, his lips covered hers as he rolled his hips against hers. She felt him hard against her. Her hands ran up his chest until they locked around his neck.

Sensing her need for air, Kouga released her lips and cotniued kissing down her neck.

"Kouga, before we – before we do this, I have some questions."

His tongue ran over the sensitive skin of her pulse point on her throat and Kagome shivered as he said, "Yes baby?" Her eyes rolled back in her head, almost forgetting how to speak. Calling her _baby_ in that voice with his tongue doing _that_.

Currently, one of his hands was in her hair, the other locked around her hip, holding her against the wall.

He was so rough and Kagome found she really enjoyed that.

 _Questions, you had questions, Kagome._

"You won't…" She felt stupid just asking. "It won't hurt when we… when you take me?"

Kouga shook his head, his nose brushing her throat in response. "Ill make love to you until the sun comes up."

 _God, I'm a goner,_ Kagome thought, squirming beneath him. _All night? Wolf demon could go all night? Figures_.

Kagome's fangs bared at the want on her face. "Maybe longer. Who knows how long it will take us to be satisfied once I've marked you."

 _Mark me_? Kagome's belly turned with fear. "M-marking me?"

"Mm-hmm." Kouga's lips trailed from her throat down to her collarbone, pushing the fabric of her shirt out of the way to continue his kisses down her body. The skin revealed to him wasn't enough and he soon grew frustrated with her odd human clothing.

"Remove this or I'm going to tear it off," he growled, nipping gently at her skin.

Kagome hurriedly removed her shirt and tossed it to the side, trying desperately to concentrate on her questions, while Kouga continued to roam his hands and lips over her newly exposed skin.

 _Something about marking…_

"Does marking hurt?"

His hand roughly spanned across the front of her waist, up then back down, followed by his hoarse reply of, "No."

"W-where do you do it?"

Kagome gasped as he nipped the shell of her ear with his teeth.

He smirked against the almost vibrating pulse at her throat. "Here." His fingers graced the top of her shoulder. "Here." He trailed down over her the bared flesh of her breast. "Or here but," his fingers glided down over her stomach until it swept over the extra soft skin of her inner thigh. "I'd prefer to mark you right here."

 _Right now._

Oh how he wanted her.

Kagome could hardly focus with his hands where they were. She had to redirect him elsewhere, so she gently took his hands and placed them upon her waist. His hands moved up and down over the sides of her waist, raising the flesh into goosebumps there.

He leaned in, not kissing her and Kagome practically sighed with relief. "Scared, kitten?"

Kagome thought about it.

She was crossing a very dangerous line with her wolf demon, who was just that, a demon. What if he became out of control like she had always feared with Inuyasha? What if they made love and he accidentally tore her in half?

Was she afraid? She closed her eyes, taking a break from the visual feast before her.

 _A little._

"Will you lose control?" she asked, her voice smaller than ever.

She opened her eyes again at the touch of his fingers across her face, her eyelids, her nose, her lips.

Kouga's eyebrows were knitted together in confusion. "Lose control? How do you mean?"

Kagome felt like crying. "The part of you that's a demon. Will you lose control and – "

"Hurt you?" he finished for her, catching her meaning. "Kagome, I am one hundred percent demon. There is no splitting of souls between human and demon. Inuyasha was a _hanyou_. I am not." And for once Kouga wasn't saying it to one up a dead man, but to make a point.

"If I lose control at all, it will be in the throes of passion, not with my demon," he continued with hooded eyes, making Kagome look down in embarrassment. His fingers coaxed her chin upward and he dusted feather light kisses on her face.

"With every ounce of my soul, I promise to protect you, to take care of you, and to make certain you are happy. I would never hurt you." He placed a final kiss on her lips. "Put those silly fears of yours to rest."

Kagome nodded, the tears receding. Of course, Kouga would never be able to hurt her. Of course. But it was still nice to be confirmed.

"So this whole mating thing," Kagome blinked away tears, finally able to think more clearly. "We do that and what? I'm yours forever?"

Kouga nodded. He seemed to have calmed down and Kagome was thankful for the break from his ravishing hands and lips on her skin. She knew she probably had bruises on her hips to look forward to, at the very least.

"We have something like that back home," Kagome said thoughtfully. _Marriage_. "I would be your wife and you would be called my husband. There's usually a ceremony involved with lots of family and friends." Kouga placed a lingering kiss on her throat and Kagome's pulse raced again. "This won't be like that, I'm assuming."

"There's no ceremony," Kouga confirmed.

"So, wolves just pick their mate and that's it? For life?" Kagome said.

Her wolf demon had begun another trail of kisses down her throat and was currently working on her collarbone.

"It's more than that," Kouga murmured, pushing her bra strap over one shoulder. "It's instinct. It's… undeniable. Once you see them, there is nothing you wouldn't do to make them yours.

"I meant it when I said that I would spend my whole existence ripping through the universe searching for you, if you hadn't returned from the well. The bond is that strong. Stronger."

"And your instincts told you that I was your mate when I was 15?" Kouga didn't answer, only slipped her other bra strap off her shoulder, kissing her shoulder.

"So it's instinct and when you've selected a mate, it means that no other man can claim me, right?"

Kouga's hands began their possessive roaming over her bared flesh again. "If another man challenged me for you after I've mated you, I would have to kill him."

Kagome shook her head. "They wouldn't dare, but…"

She had to slow this down, way down.

"Kouga, can you give me the night to think about all of this?" It was a lot to take in.

He placed a final kiss on her cheek. "Yes, but I'm not letting you out of my arms or out of my sight."

End notes: Yes, Kagome was dreaming and I promise you won't be disappointed the next chapter.


	13. Chapter 12: Falling Down (Part I)

**Author Note: A lotttttt happens this chapter. Saddle up, my friends.**

" _All great and precious things are lonely." –John Steinbeck, East of Eden_

It was morning and just to Kouga's word, he hadn't let up his hold as they slept on his bed of furs. Truthfully, it was the most well rested she had felt since her first night here when Kouga had held her all night. It was difficult to imagine that was only a week ago.

Before they had fallen asleep, Kagome had put her clothing back in it's rightful place, much to Kouga's displeasure. There would be lots of time for _that_ , well, later.

"Kouga?" Kagome asked, trying in vain to escape his heavy embrace over her waist. He only tugged her closer, his face twisting in anguish. She sighed, propped up on one elbow, stroking his face. First his brows until they relaxed, then his cheek, his nose, his lips, his chin. "Kouga."

"Kagome?" he asked, peering up at her in wonder.

"Hey," she said quietly, still petting his face, his hair, running her fingers lightly over the point of his ear. His face was concentrating the details of her face, memorizing her as if he couldn't believe she was real. She didn't mind. Kouga had always gazed at her like this.

She blinked slowly with realization.

 _He_ has _always looked at my like this._

Kagome thought about how she had questioned her existence, her purpose in life just a few weeks ago and now, she couldn't imagine being anywhere else. She hadn't imagined loving anyone after Inuyasha, but here she was with the wolf demon who had professed his love for her eight years earlier. He had been certain of his feelings then as he was now, and he had loved her unselfishly, unconditionally, waiting eight years for her to come back around. She did not doubt that he would have waited hundreds of years, to find her in her own time.

His words from yesterday rang in her ears.

 _I will spend my entire existence tearing through the universe looking for you. I will never stop running and I will stop looking for you. Do you understand?_

She did. She understood perfectly how deep his love for her ran and it made her eyes glisten with tears.

He frowned up at her, his warm hand holding her face. "What's wrong?"

She smiled brightly back at him, glistening eyes and all. "Nothing at all. Everything is perfect."

His face softened at her words and her lingering fingers on his face.

"We should get up," Kagome suggested, yet made no move to release herself from his arms. "Doesn't your pack need you?"

Kouga grinned wolfishly, his thumb brushing over her cheek. "I agree. Just one thing first."

"What?"

Kouga pulled her face down to his and kissed her thoroughly, while keeping a gentle hold of her face. This kiss was gentle and careful, unlike many of their other kisses. There was no fear that one would be without the other. Or perhaps, Kagome reasoned that even wolves were slow in the morning.

She giggled and he felt the vibration of her laugh against his lips. He separated their lips, looking up at her with his blue eyes, bright and alive. "Think kissing me is funny, do you?" Without warning, Kouga flipped them over, causing Kagome to burst with laughter.

If you had asked him in that moment what his favorite sound was, it was most definitely her laugh, and as his hand cradled the back of her head, he realized that he wanted to spend the rest of his life making her laugh.

She smiled up at him, her hands in his hair. "Definitely not funny," she replied brightly.

He kissed her soundly before saying, "I'm so in love with you."

Years ago, those words would have scared her and made her run away. Years ago, those same words had made her slap this very same wolf demon, but she had been young and naïve, and he a little too sure of himself.

Kagome continued stroking her fingers through his hair and touching his face. "You've had almost a decade of instinct telling you that you love me and I'll admit that I got a little lost, but..." Her breath hitched in her throat with his kiss to her palm. "Can you give me some time to catch up?"

She prayed that she had not wounded him by saying this and if it did, he showed no sign of pain.

She leaned up and pressed her lips to his. "I promise I won't take that long."

Kouga had told her that he would be back shortly, that she had nothing to worry about, that she should stay close to the den, that he was _just_ patrolling the area. He had kissed her deeply, before kicking up the dirt around him, speeding off.

So Kagome had done as he asked and remained close to the den, hunting around the small area by which she had found the small critters a few days before. She wasn't even really hunting for food or to kill anything. Quite honestly, she missed a few of the rabbits on purpose, just shooting for sport or distance.

Kagome was so lost in concentration and the forest floor rustling to her left caused her to spin in that direction and release an arrow.

She had missed the red head by millimeters. Why hadn't she moved? Did the demoness have a death wish?

"Ayame! You scared me half to death!" Kagome said, reproaching the demoness. "What are you doing sneaking up on me?"

Ayame seemed unmoved by Kagome's anger and remained still as she had not almost been pierced by Kagome's arrow.

"You didn't touch me," she said, brushing her off. "I'm fine."

Kagome huffed, running a hand through her hair. "If I had purified you, you would be singing a much different tune right now."

Ayame shrugged, sitting on the forest floor, eyeing the arrow Kagome had just shot with a little too much interest. "What else have I got to lose?" she said quietly.

Kagome turned away, surveying the grounds before her.

"I come in peace, Kagome," Ayame offered. Kagome aggressively released the arrow, piercing into the tree some hundred feet off. Kagome squared her shoulders, glaring in Ayame's direction.

"Yeah? That would be a first," Kagome retorted, shouldering another arrow onto her bow.

For a moment, Kagome thought perhaps she was being too harsh, considering everything Ayame had been through. She knew all too well what it was like to love someone who didn't love you back. Sympathy flooded her veins and she put her arrow back in the quiver on her back.

"What do you want, Ayame?"

The wolf demoness cringed. "Figured you could use some company?" she tried weakly.

Kagome huffed. "I can hunt for myself, Ayame. I don't need your – "

"Kouga never once mated. Not when you disappeared or when I tried to convince him you weren't going to come back." Ayame rested her chin on her folded arms over her knees. "I told him every single day that you weren't going to come back and he still wouldn't give up on you."

Kagome sighed. "If it makes you feel any better, I hadn't planned to come back."

Shame would not allow Ayame to make eye contact with the raven haired woman.

 _It didn't matter,_ Ayame thought. _I was cruel and you didn't deserve it._

"I'm sorry about Inuyasha and I'm sorry for calling him a shit mutt." There. That was it. That was the only apology Kagome would ever get.

Kagome thought about telling Ayame that in her world, they considered dogs and wolves to be a part of the same family, but held her tongue.

 _Perhaps I am being too hard on her._

Bending down to collect her kill, Kagome stood, dusting the dirt from her hands. "I'm sorry for the way Kouga handled things before." She knew she needn't address what moment. Ayame knew.

The redhead shook her head. "No. I threatened you and I disobeyed the Alpha. I deserved that."

Kagome didn't pretend to understand pack laws, but she wouldn't argue with Ayame about what was deserved. It wasn't the place.

"I'm pathetic, really." Ayame's voice was so small. "I told him every day that you weren't coming back and he told me every single day that he didn't want me, and still I…"

Kagome remembered Kouga's words reverberating through the wolf den after he had tossed her to the ground. _You're pathetic._

"You aren't pathetic, Ayame," Kagome said. "Loving someone who doesn't love you back takes a lot of courage."

Ayame nodded, hiding her face from her. "You're probably right."

Kagome took this as the end to their conversation and began her walk back to the den to start a fire.

"You know?" came Ayame's voice, carrying over the short distance. Kagome could hear the tears in her voice. "I know that he probably won't ever admit to this, but I really don't think Kouga would have ever mated another woman had you not come back. It's a lonely life without a mate, Kagome."

Kagome nodded back to the red head.

"And for what it's worth, I think you're going to make a great Princess of the East."

 _Princess_. Kagome nodded. That was right. Kouga was the Prince of the East. She would have to ask him about that. For now, she was content with the peace she had made with the fiery red head.

"Thank you, Ayame."

Kagome splashed cold water from the lake onto her face. The very same lake in which she had first asked Kouga to kiss her and the two brother wolves Ginta and Hakkaku had disrupted them. Whether they were actually brothers was left to the unknown, but they sure acted like it.

She laughed softly at the memory, standing to her feet. The territory surrounding the wolf dens had been calm today, but Kagome felt a shiver run through her as she felt the air change around her. The sky grew dark with clouds that promised storms ahead and she smelled the rain coming in the air.

Up ahead, the wolves were returning, with the men who returned, some of them injured. At the back of the pack was Kouga covered in blood, flanked by Hakkaku and another man she knew but couldn't place a name to, holding him up.

 _Kouga!_

She didn't hear herself screaming and had not realized she had taken flight until a pair of arms held her back, preventing her forward motion. She turned, recognizing Ginta who looked pained to be holding her back.

"Let _GO_ of me!" she roared, but Ginta didn't let go. "Ginta, I have to get to Kouga! LET ME GO!"

"You shouldn't see this, Little Sister," he said, pulling her backwards, away from the scene before her.

The heart crushing pain she had felt had returned with a vengeance, crippling her. She felt like her insides were collapsing. She had never felt this much pain. "You have to – I have to – Kouga!" She was out of breath, trying to remove Ginta's arms from her waist.

"I'm sorry, Little Sister," Ginta said and he sounded genuinely apologetic. Still, he gathered her in his arms and carried her off towards the den.

"I can't! _I can't!_ _Please_ , Ginta! I have to see him! This hurts so badly! It hurts!" Kagome howled, tearing at her chest, collapsing on the ground within the den with tears pouring down her face.

 _Is this what mates feel when the other is hurt?_

 _Is this what dying feels like?_

 _Is Kouga dying?_

 _No, no, no, no, no._

Ginta squatted down beside Kagome as she tried to control her breathing.

This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening. Why was Kouga covered in blood and limping.

"That isn't something you should be seeing, Sister, "Ginta tried to reason kindly.

"Why is he – Why are you – I thought he was leaving to patrol the area – why – what the hell _happened?!_ " Kagome finally asked, feeling her mind reeling, feeling like she couldn't breathe.

Ginta sighed. "We were patrolling the area and there was a demon attacking a nearby village." As he spoke, Kagome fit the words together like a puzzle piece. "He said that we can't protect every village, but it's our duty to help when we can."

Kagome's breathing did not slow and she tried to focus on the conversation. "What happened to Kouga? Why is he covered in blood?" Her heart clenched in agony.

Ginta hesitated a moment too long.

Fear laced Kagome's skin. "Ginta, tell me!"

"It's not his blood, Kagome," Ginta said, looking at the ground. She understood that it may perhaps be disrespectful to look at another man's woman in the eyes, but she wished he would look at her.

 _If it wasn't Kouga's blood he was covered in…_

Kagome tried to think back to who she had not seen just a few moments ago. She searched her memory and the anguish nearly swallowed her up.

"Ginta, tell me whose blood that was," Kagome demanded, her eyes wide.

"She wasn't supposed to be there. Women don't usually fight in battles between demon." As Ginta explained, Kagome's eyes filled to the brim with hot tears. "Not that she wasn't strong. She was, but…" he trailed off.

"Women don't fight. It's just not how things are done," he added passionately.

Kagome's lip trembled as tears fell from her eyes.

"She had tried to take the demon on her own and when Kouga arrived…"

Kagome's tears blinded her as they fell hot onto the ground below her. "Tell me," she demanded softly. "Please."

Ginta shook his head. "Kouga will have my head. These are not things you should be hearing."

Kagome laughed bitterly. "I'll take responsibility for it, Ginta. I'll tell him I made you tell me. He'll believe that," she said, smiling sadly. Ginta returned the grin, if only for a moment. "Please, Ginta."

"The demon ripped her apart right in front of him," Ginta said quietly.

Kagome felt like the ground had disappeared beneath her.

It could not be.

They had just become sort of friends, hadn't they? Something less than enemies, at the very least. It wasn't fair.

Dammit all, if it wasn't fair.

As if on cue, thunder clapped and lightning flashed overhead, rain falling down heavy and hard.

Something Ayame had said earlier in the forest slapped Kagome across the face, and she leaned up to touch her own face as if she had been struck by her ghost.

 _What else have I got to lose?_

"Ayame. She… she did this because of me. I-"

"Kagome, you can't blame yourself for this," Ginta reasoned. "Ayame was…" He plopped down and crossed his legs. "Stubborn."

"But I should have seen this coming!" Kagome cried. "Just this morning, she asked me if she had anything else to lose. I should have – "

Ginta took careful calculation in how he rested his hand on her shoulder. "Kagome, you can't go down that road. Ayame is gone and there is nothing you could have done to protect her from running off into battle like that. She was careless."

Ginta's words did not remove the guilt or cease the burning ache of her heart.

"But Kouga, why was Hakkaku holding him up?"

"We defeated the demon, but in the process, Kouga broke a few ribs. He will be healed in a few hours," Ginta explained easily.

Kagome looked up, wiping the hot tears from her face. _Hours_.

 _Broken ribs would take weeks to heal._

Ginta could sense her confusion. "Wolf demon heal a lot faster than humans do, Kagome. He's a little beat up and tired, but he's going to be fine."

"I want to see him," Kagome insisted, standing to her feet. "Now."

"Little Sister, wait!" Ginta demanded, grabbing her wrist. "It isn't safe out."

"Thank you, Ginta, that's enough," came a rough voice and Ginta released Kagome's wrist.

Kouga had appeared at the foot of the den and Kagome couldn't believe her eyes. Once covered in red, Kouga stood before her, a little worse for wear, a few bruises, drenched from head to foot, but otherwise whole. That was good enough for her.

Her breath hitched as she ran to him, leaping into his arms, throwing her arms and legs around him. He barely wavered a step back as he caught her full force, wrapping his solid arms around her in a crushing embrace.

Without considering the other wolf as her audience, she grabbed Kouga's face and kissed him hard on the lips, her heart pounding in her chest. The clenching pain lessening only slightly.

 _He's real, he's alive and he's here. I'm not dreaming. Thank the heavens!_

"I thought – I thought – I couldn't –" Kagome could hardly speak for tears, running her hands over his face and chest.

"Shhh." He shushed her, shaking his head, holding her up with one hand and caressing the side of her face with the other. "I'm fine. I'm sorry that I frightened you. You must have been worried."

"G-Ginta told me what happened with, with Ayame," Kagome hiccupped and when Kouga's face turned toward Kouga in anger, she pulled it back towards her. "I made him! I made him tell me. I was so worried!"

Kouga sighed, resting his forehead against Kagome's, content just to have her in his arms, even weeping and afraid. It distracted him from the craziness of what had just occurred.

 _Ayame. I'm so sorry._

"I will address the pack later this evening, but for the time being, we are not to be disturbed until I say otherwise," Kouga addressed Ginta who nodded.

"Yes, Boss."

Kouga walked back to his area of the den, the closed off area in which he and Kagome slept and plopped down on the floor with her still wrapped around him. If possible, Kagome began to cry even harder in his arms.

"Darling, it's alright," he soothed, rubbing small circles up along her back.

She quieted momentarily to gaze up at him, memorizing his face, ensuring he was all there. "Are – are you hurt? Am I hurting you?"

His eyebrows knit together in the way he did when he was stressed. Kouga looked her over and other than slightly pink cheeks and nose, she was absolutely perfect. He ran his fingers touched her face and she sighed.

He smiled up at her. "No."

"I thought you were gravely wounded," she wept quietly now, one hand propped on his shoulder, the other pressed against his cheek. She leaned away from him slightly, hoping to lessen the weight on his ribs. She didn't care that his drenched skin and hair had soaked through her clothes.

Kouga longed to kiss those pouty lips of hers until she wasn't sad anymore. Until she was laughing again, like this morning.

"I'm not," he said, kissing the palm of her hand, inhaling her scent. Her scent was mixed with the saltiness of her tears and the scent of his fellow brethren Ginta, but he reasoned that Ginta was only doing as he had asked. To keep Kagome in the den until he rinsed off the remnants of blood that coated his skin and hair. The blood of Ayame.

Still.

Kouga groaned as he stood up, carrying Kagome with him. "The storm has passed and you need to wash off."

Kagome frowned, no longer crying. She wiped the lingering tears from her face. _Could he be serious?_

"Right now? Why, I –"

The den was now full of his fellow men and their women, and wolves scattered about. Kouga had to step over a few of them. "Kouga, put me down. I don't need a bath right this minute." She tried to wiggle out of his embrace, but his arms would not release her. "Your pack-"

"Can wait," he said forcefully, not even glancing over his shoulder. "This cannot."

She could do nothing but submit herself to the wolf demon holding her, determined that she bath right this second, no matter how ridiculous his request was.

True to his word, the rain had stopped and the clouds had lifted slightly to reveal the evening sky, though it wasn't enough to warm the air around them. The sky was a muted pink, partially hidden beneath the clouds that still lingered.

Kagome ceased her struggle to get away, and rested her arms back around Kouga's neck. "Can I at least ask why?"

Kouga's nose wrinkled in disgust. "You smell like Ginta."

 _Oh._

 _And that bothers him. It bothers him a lot for his woman to carry the scent of another male._

"Well, that's all you had to say," she mumbled.

When Kouga did not say anything, she continued, "I can walk, ya know? I'm not going to run off."

Kouga smirked. "I like carrying you."

Kagome sighed.

 _I suppose you would_.

Kouga didn't want to admit that he had been afraid, even for a second that he might fail. He had always fought for his pack without giving it another thought. He had always fought with everything he had, but he would be lying if he had not thought about the possibility of leaving Kagome and what that might do to her if he didn't return home one day.

Holding in the whimper, he trudged on toward the hot spring with Kagome in his arms. Quickly reaching the spring, he finally placed Kagome on her feet and waited.

"Uh… Kouga, can you, um –" Kagome knew that nudity probably wasn't a big deal for wolves, but she was feeling a little shy. "Can you turn around?" When he looked at her hard, she added, "Please."

She waited until he did as she asked before she started to remove her clothing. "Just stay – turned around for another moment."

Kagome got an idea in her head and she wasn't sure if now was the right time or what Kouga's reaction would be, but she would just have to try. Right now, she would do anything to lift his mood.

"You've got ten seconds to get in that water before I turn around," he barked, when he felt Kagome's small delicate hand grab his.

Before she could lose her nerve, she tugged on his hand. "You can turn around now," she said quietly, trembling as she waited for him to turn around.

His eyes roamed over her lithe figure, clad in nothing but her human under garments. They were black and covered in lace and much nicer than she planned for. Kagome just wasn't that kind of girl. But as it was, Kouga seemed to like it and she shivered under his gaze.

"Kagome?" he asked, his eyes meeting hers, shining and warm. "You don't have to –"

Acting brave, Kagome took his hand and walked them towards the spring, her feet walking back into the spring first. "Join me? Please, Kouga."

He shook visibly. "Kagome, I don't know when I'll be able to stop, I – "

She nodded, feeling a little afraid. "I know. You don't have to stop though."

To make her point hit home, she unclipped her bra and tossed it with the rest of her clothes. Still feeling shy, she kept her long hair over her breasts, covering her modesty. She walked backwards into the spring, pulling Kouga along with her.

In spite of her anxiety about crossing this new territory with Kouga, Kagome knew that this was where she was supposed to be right now. A few weeks ago, she had questioned everything in her life and never did she imagine herself here.

Kouga waded into the spring, completely entranced by the woman before him. Without warning, Kouga pushed her hair off her shoulders and onto her back, almost angrily that her hair would obstruct his view from his mate's pretty flesh.

And then he kissed her.

 **Author Note: Don't worry, we aren't done. Thank you for your kind reviews. I don't deserve you all.**


	14. Chapter 13: Falling Down (Part II)

" _But I love your feet  
only because they walked  
upon the earth and upon  
the wind and upon the waters,  
until they found me."  
– Pablo Neruda, Your Feet_

 _In spite of her anxiety about crossing this new territory with Kouga, Kagome knew that this was where she was supposed to be right now. A few weeks ago, she had questioned everything in her life and never did she imagine herself here._

 _Kouga waded into the spring, completely entranced by the woman before him. Without warning, Kouga pushed her hair off her shoulders and onto her back, almost angrily that her hair would obstruct his view from his mate's pretty flesh._

 _And he kissed her._

Fire. Everything was fire and hands and flesh and touch and lips and Kouga. He was kissing her and tenderly holding her face, guiding her deeper into the warm spring, his hips pushing against hers, one step at a time, his lips never leaving hers.

When Kouga had returned from their fight with the demon and Kagome had seen him covered in blood, all she could think about was getting to him. All she could think about was what she might ever do without him and that is when she knew. That is when she knew that her mother had been right, that she was perhaps more in love with Kouga than she cared to acknowledge.

It made no sense. How she felt, having only been with him for a week and instinct or not, she didn't care anymore. She loved him and that is what she knew, like she knew the back of her hand, the way she knew Souta's favorite cereal, knew her mother's favorite flower, knew how much Sango loved her children, and knew that if it were not for that dumb Bone Eater's well and the sum of all the things that had happened to her that she might not be here right now with him.

And that was crazy. Kagome could not imagine a time before or after Kouga and she didn't want to. If Mama had told her anything, it was that love could be just that.

Love is crazy and without rules and it doesn't have to make any sense, and when you find it you have to hang on. Just as Kagome knew her love for the wolf prince, she knew his love for her, that it outweighed the stars and the moon and time that had separated them, that Kouga would have waited 500 years to see her again if he had to, that he would have found her and he would have loved her, no matter where or when, that his love would have moved time and space for them to be together.

Kagome thought about death and whether or not Ayame had felt any pain as she died. She thought about their conversation by this very spring, about how she had said that it took courage to love someone who doesn't love you back. She reasoned that perhaps it took courage to love when you had lost, too, that it took courage to love at all.

As he broke their kiss and gazed down upon her, she never felt more beautiful or lovely or loved.

"Say something," he beckoned, his bright blue eyes drugged and full of his want.

She thought back on that morning after he had kissed her and said, "I'm so in love with you."

And her words didn't make any sense, didn't align with how long it took a normal person to _fall in love_ , didn't follow any rules, but she knew them wildly to be true. Kagome's breath hitched in her throat as his lips hovered centimeters from hers.

"That isn't what I thought you would say, but I'm glad to hear it all the same."

"So is this part that is instinct?" Kagome wanted to know, running her hands up and down his chest. "Loving you?"

Kouga shook his head. "I don't know how to answer that. Isn't all love like this? Don't you just _know_?" He leaned in to kiss her once, twice.

Kagome considered his words. She had often heard it said that once you found love, real love that you did _just know_ , love at first sight and all, but she hadn't believed any of it. "If I know that I love you, does it matter?"

He placed his forehead against hers, sighing as he felt her body against his. "I suppose not."

"Kouga, will you always love me?" she asked, knowing the answer.

"Always," he repeated, his lips pouring kisses down her collarbone.

Her eyes filled with tears. "You know that I will grow old someday. That I will die."

He didn't pause. "I know that, too."

Kagome bit down on her lip. "Why do you love me?"

She had never asked, but now wanted to know.

He paused as though someone had doused cold water over his head. _Why? Why does the wolf love the moon?_

He looked down on her lovingly and fanned his fingers through her hair. "I love your dark hair." His thumb brushed against her lips. "Your face, your eyes, your lips…" and he kissed each of them in turn. "I love the way your body curves," he kissed first down her shoulder and his fans rolled over her breast and down the curve of her hips. "I like the way you bite your lip when I touch you," he said, grinning.

"I love how stubborn you are, how kind and generous you are, the way your body gives at my touch." Just to prove his point, he lavished more kisses along her throat and pressed his hands around her hips, and Kagome bucked her hips against him, gasping softly. Kouga thrust his thumbs through the waistband of her underwear on either side of her hips like holsters. "And god, I love your weird human clothes, especially these."

Kagome threw her head back, laughing. It was such a, well, _Kouga-esque_ thing to say.

"Your laugh, I love your laugh," he added, eyes hooded, half smiling, drunk off her skin.

Suddenly Kagome felt the urge to tell Kouga something, to make sure he knew this, he had to know. "Kouga, you aren't my second choice, I – I'm not here, because – because _he_ isn't." Her voice started strong before gradually lowering in volume to almost a whisper. "You aren't second."

He grinned down at her and kissed her hard, his lips hot and burning against hers. He knew. He had to know this and she was certain by the cocky, self-assured way he smirked, the way he possessively locked his hands around her hips that he knew this.

Her body thrummed under his touch, his fingers electrifying her skin and burning her alive.

Of course he knew. He knew that even if the hanyou had died that it would have been a fight, but that instinct would have won out, that he would have shown her that he was the only choice. He thought about how touch bonded mates before they joined as one and how he had almost kissed her eight years ago, how difficult it had been to release her back to the well after their lips had touched just one night before. Instinct and his touch would have bonded them, he was certain of it.

 _You aren't second._

As sure as he had always been of his love for Kagome and her eventual falling, there was always a small part of him that had feared that Ayame was right. That she didn't love him, that she wouldn't come back, that he would be lonely forever.

That's the funny thing about falling though. She was here. She was solid and in spite of all the shit that had happened today, she was beautiful and giving and his and right here.

"You weren't second, I just couldn't see you," she said breathlessly between kisses.

"I know," he whispered back. "I know."

Then, he made her his over and over again until the sky brought dawn upon them.

 **Author Note: I don't know if I'm perfectly content with this, but I wanted to get this up because I don't know when I'll be able to update again (I** _ **will**_ **update this, it might just not be for a couple weeks, instead of every other day). Things are happening with work/life and I won't have as easy of an access to a computer every day. But never fear! More is to come.**


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